PMD- "I Felt Superior and Happy!" (c) a class divided.
There has been much racial activity and tension as of late. It is scary! In time where you think black and other people of color are finally waking up! You find that they opened their eyes long enough to turn over and go back to sleep!
It makes you wonder if people are committing these insane crimes against one another in a tit for tat racial match. You OJ we get Jena, You get Rodney King we get Sean Bell. Hmmm Sean Bell...Mychal Bell??? I am not saying that is what going on. I am however pointing out some facts that just seem too eerily close to a conspiracy! For the sake of saving the future our race [the righteous] maybe we should make pain staking strides to implement a lesson like this one!
PMD- Why Men Don't Have a Ball Scrub or Something?
This video says it all! I was watching an old comic view and one of the comediennes made a good dayum point. Why don't men have Just for Men's Ball Scrum, Tag, or Axe Scrotum Cleanser? Men have not so fresh days too? Like the activities of the day don't settle on their nutz? Women aren't the only one with problems. I was just wondering?
It's my 28th Birthday... I'm extremely excited about what the day has to offer. I love my mother, my kids, and all of my readers thank you very much for all that you say and do for me. I won't be blogging until about Wednesday. So Feel free to drop some links to your blog or others you read in the comment section...
Check out Thembi, Hoeism, Ninja Girl, Hot NIkz, Allthatsfab & my personal Favorite and fellow Libra Pop Junkie
All Roads to Ving Rhames BUMP Kevin Bacon! Thundercats Hoooooooo!!
This is the random ass truth coming at you softcore with a chaser! I was thinking today.
I do that sometimes despite what people might say (don't listen to them)!
I said: "Self"
Self: "Hmmmm?"
I said: "There is a 6 degree of separation factor between you and Ving Rhames! Because I went to the movies to see "Baby Boy"! (I still want my money back!)
I Paid Ving a whole $1.50 after the movie theater, box office, productions company, taxes, and FICA took their share of the money.
Self: Yeah! You sure did. Wonder if there are any other paths to Ving? Let's Picture map this out!
1. ME...
2. Went to movies to see Die hard $6.00...
3. 9 years later started hanging with now BFF...
4. BFF's uncle is Reginald Vel Johnson (Carl Winslow) who was a cop in Die Hard...
5. Who worked with Bruce Willis husband of Demi Moore at the time of Striptease...
6. Casted in Striptease was Ving Rhames !
Then I started thinking (yes again)! With the success of cartoons and comics being made into movies, what if someone with a good script created a screen adaptation of the Thundercats and casted Ving Rhames as Panthro! HOOOOOO!
Told ya this was random! Name anyone (celebs plz) and I can lead them back to Ving!
"What They Say?": Reasons why people shouldn't be allowed on Public Access. I had a few questions but I am only gonna ask two.
1. What's up with the socks?
2. Is she saying Natty?
It's that time of the week again when I pull out my dick and wave it in the air like I just don't care. Alright well it's not that time but its time for me to drop another blog and demonstrate why I have so much more swag then the rest of the Negroids of the world. Yesterday while walking to the store, I saw these 2 rock stars standing in front of the entrance to Wendy's buying cologne from a street peddler. (Metro-Mania at it's finest.) This image brought me to today's blog the importance of picking the proper outfit for your big date.
See I don't give a damn about my appearance at times, I will walk to the store looking like a str8 crack head. I mean I looking like such a crack head that Bobby Brown would be jealous. Figures that once I walk into the store it would be full of fly women whose only purpose is to hold my semen and birth future baby blogxilla's But only I can't talk to them b/c I look like a crack head. A fly crack head like G-Money at the end of New Jack City but a crack head none the less.
It's just that I don't feel the need to be fly all the time. Who cares!?!?! My goal in life is not to impress anyone, it's to educate the world and write daily blogs until every post gets hundred comments or more. (Big Shouts to Ninja Girl & Hot NIkz for holding me down) side note the comment section has been popping as of late y'all should stick around and join the conversation... but I digress.
The First Date
Now once the date come into play, I must say I take my time to put effort in my appearance, I make sure the dreads & shape up are PHRESH, my clothing matches perfectly, my sneakers are clean and I smell like a GOD!! It's this extra time in maintaining ones appearance which lets the lady know you care, b/c chances are if you care about the way you look, you'll care about her. One thing I had to learn the hard way is that a woman expects a man to be fly all the time. Just as a man demands that his woman looks just as remarkable in some sweats and a pony tail as she does in pumps and one of those backless shirt.
Yet my mind wonders why does appearance matter so much? Are we that superficial or do we just want to feel like we are cared about enough to have someone bathe before coming into our presence?
The amount of racial injustice in this country in the past few years have gotten out of control. Last week there was the biggest civil rights rally/march of OUR times. It was a beautiful site I must say, but my heart is sad b/c it accomplished absolutely nothing.
What happened the very next day some racist whites attached even more noeses to the back of a pick up truck. And then what happened? The Same racist judge who gave Mychal Bell life for a school yard fight refused to release him, on a charge that was dropped.
While Bush sits on capital hill ready to pardon Scooter Libby, and Bell sits in jail while we put up our black outfits and get back to our lives and shake our head at how messed up this case is. But it doesn't stop here in WV Megan Williams sits in a room reliving the trauma of a week long tortured and rape by even more racist whites. Much hasn't change from the days of Martin and Malcolm. Cept Martin and Malcolm. Yet we Believe that we overcame some sort hurdle which allowed us to integrate this place called America.
The Great Malcolm X said "Look at yourselves. Some of you teenagers, students. How do you think I feel and I belong to a generation ahead of you - how do you think I feel to have to tell you, 'We, my generation, sat around like a knot on a wall while the whole world was fighting for its hum an rights - and you've got to be born into a society where you still have that same fight.' What did we do, who preceded you ? I'll tell you what we did. Nothing. And don't you make the same mistake we made"
We can't give up on the momentum. It has become obvious to me that the peaceful road we are on is coming to an end. It is criminal to teach a man not to defend himself, when he is the constant victim of brutal attacks. And It is clear if you pay attention to all the cases NOT in the news that the black race has come under attack. We must act w/ some sort of revolution. The power that blogger have has become clear w/ the Jena 6 case. We made the media pay attention to this issue, We brought this case to the world. We made them pay attention... So we can't drop this issue now!! It would be self defeating to drop the issue of racial injustice. A white man will get half of the time a black man gets for the same crime. A white person in a Hurricane is looking for food, a Black person left for dead in water up to his neck is looting. We aren't suppose to eat when we are starving we are expected to roll over and die.
They have waged war against Black men and women all over America.
You know about Jena 6 Attack number 1 million and 1 against the black man Now learn about attact 1 million and 2 against the black woman. Megan Williams was kidnapped by 6 white pigs who forced her to eat rat droppings, choked her with a cable cord and stabbed her in the leg while calling her a NIGGER, according to criminal complaints. They also poured hot water over her, made her drink from a toilet, and beat and sexually assaulted her during a span of about a week
She told the authorities:
Q: Okay. So, How come they poured a can of wax on you?
For No reason. I was sitting... and they made me suck uh bobby's mom's toes and also, lick her... her butt
Q: Just be blunt. Just tell us just how it is. thats how we want it
They made me lick her for nothing. I didn't even do nothing. They said is i didn't do it they would kill me. And they put me out in the building and tied me up and everything.
Q: In the outbuilding with the pups?
Yeah.
They said it was because i was colored. They said they don't like black people they said they were going to hang me.
You know the sad part about this is that a few people won't read this b/c they don't like me. My people are lost and I wish they would get over them self and see the bigger picture. Wake up People.
The Planet Formerly Knows As Pluto - Rumors are she had a boob job!! You think?
Better wear some sexy clothes. Yes it's monday time for people to get back to work. Now what better way to kick off the week then to talk about the sexy clothes that females wear. Yes clothes that ooze sexiness, scream fuck me, yell bend me over, smack my ass and call me susie!!! Man, it's something about the female body that just does something to me. Whether it's at the club and the light skinned shorty has on this nice lime green outfit, toes out and manicured perfectly and lips juicier than a georgia peach, or In the bedroom and it's the French maid outfit that makes my ManXilla go BOINNNGGG!! I love it. So I'll keep it short today so tell me: It's Friday, You just got paid, and it's time to do your man... What are you putting on to make him go HMMMMMM!!!!
You know! We Americans don't support our brothers and sisters' artistry from across the pond as much as they support us. They will spend $$$ on our artists but we don't return the favor. Yea, we're better in some aspects of music. However, I feel our decline slowly but surely. Count the number of projects from Europe, England, or Africa that you have in your repertoire? Flowetry? David Craig? Corrine Bailey, maybe? AND NO David Hasselhoff doesn't count. So, I took some time to find a couple of artists from across the pond that you might appreciate.The Perverted Monk's World Tour will be my internet adventure to finding good music from everywhere so we can expand our collections. MMMKay?
First off the Press is England and Netherlands!!!
Have you Nether, Nether, Nether in Your Whole Entire Life?
This Dutch chick is Ida Corr is cool...I am feeling her club mixes off her Album "Streetdiva"! You don't expect her to have the powerful voice she has. Girly, can get it! If you don't like club mixes you might not like her, but I say give her a chance. You ain't got isht to do it's, Monday!
Britian that is Fish and Chips, Crumpets, ....Hot Tea!
MC from England called Kano. Dude is aiight. I am feeling him' but I will warn you dude has a weird style. He starts off sounding like MnM, but then his flow becomes all focked around and he starts sounding like RZA/GZA. You know that syncopated, I'm not quite on the beat but I am type of flow! When you go to his site, on the first track's snippet, "This is the Girl," I am expecting NeYo or T-Pain to ring in on the hook. Instead you get that soft singing David Craig/Larry David/Craig David that is looking old a hell, like he's 35! He looks older than Shaggy (BooooooooomBastic). Da hell happened? OH well! 'Ere's da Vidgeo.
Just for Fun...this dude soundz flicted and he broke the mic!
Where in the World is the Perverted Monk going to next? Come again and see!
He's the King of Pop.....can this dude take his throne??? Hell naw (not in album sales), but if this guy can dance he's in a good position to take MJ's place. Not only does he sound like Michael Jackson, but they look like not to distance cousins! Hailing from Silver Springs, MD is Jason Malachi an Italian-American musician that sounds like "the girl is mine" Michael Jackson. Remember the brown Mike!
If this white boy can dance like Ersher or Justin Timbaland then he will sellout stadiums all over the world. You know folks are having MJ withdrawls! Check Jason out you will be amazed at the likeness! There is even a Barry White Sample in one of the songs that is BANANAS, not because the song is hott. It's Barry White sampled in a falseto singer's song! HUH?
I know somewhere in the world there is a father who really really regrets stepping out on his kid right now. You see when they grow up, whether you're there or not... They are going to do things that will make you proud. But only that feeling of proudness which was ordained to go to you, is not going to fly up and smack you in the face. Instead it will be regret, shame, and disgust as you realize that you had nothing to do with the success of making a wonderful child.
It feels good seeing the growth of the site, If i could personally thank each and every one of you I would. I've been taking a few request and one of the topics I received was Welfare. (Jolli a comment would be nice ) I couldn't touch this topic w/o talking about one of the only ladies I ever truly loved. My Mother. You see i grew up in the projects of New Jersey where 2 things ruled... Welfare & Drugs.
You see a typical morning for me was waking up to morning cartoons and a bowl of No Frill cornflakes. Looking back I never knew I was poor, b/c everyone ate Fruit O's for breakfast. But this morning was special, it was the 3rd of the month so we actually had Kellogg's Frosted Flakes. I pulled my bowl out of the dish rack, noticing 3 roaches scatter, I paid them no mind I was used to them by now. I poured my bowl of cereal and began to eat. The Smurfs was on, and right as Gargamel was about to start fucking w/ the Smurfette & Lazy Smurf (Who I think wasn't so much lazy just a chronic weed head) I looked down into my bowl of frosted flakes and saw a baby roach. It took me 10 years to eat flakes again. Being on Welfare was like that, even when you get a treat you still get tricked.
After about the 15th when everybody was broke again, and the food stamps started to run out you got to go outside more and play w/ your crew. We would ride our bikes, most of them stolen, stripped down and spray painted for obvious reasons. One afternoon, I was out in the streets riding bikes and doing tricks and shit, see my bike had a flat so I had to borrow one of my boys bikes... the bike w/ no breaks. The kind you had to put your foot in the back tire to make it come to a stop. SO we are racing and I'm winning and I'm getting amped up b/c like Kanye, I never win... and while i'm looking back talking shit, my friend yells watch out... I'm going full speed right into a brick wall so i do what any kid would do... I put my feet on the ground... but only it didn't stop the bike keep doing crashing into the wall. I walked w/ a limp for the rest of the month i swear.
But as I look back I love my life now, I've come along way from that kid w/ the extra curly hair and the cheap sneakers. I'm a writer who is read all over the world, I have readers in Europe, Germany and Korea. I plan to blog from the top of the Eiffel Tower one day. WiFi But life if great thanks for asking. Welfare can be used as a good thing a tool to help people lives get better I was blessed w/ a strong mother and a great brain. Thanks God.
By now you have all heard the story, or some version of it, Mostly b/c Civil rights activists, bloggers and black radio hosts helped spread the word about the case, demanding an end to what they see as unequal justice. “We will not rest” until all charges are dropped against the Jena Six. But I'm not here to beat you in the head about the story of these 6 teens or even about racism, it exist... If you don't know this by now you might as well tie a rope around your neck and roll down the steps until you choke out to death. I'm here to point out the fact that we have to STOP ACTING LIKE NIGGERS. Example Number 1
1 - Jesse Jackson
This Rainbow clad negro goes and fucks up all the good about the Jena 6 and says that Barack Obama was "acting like he was white" for not speaking out about "Jena 6". It's shit like this that makes one of our greatest leaders irrelevant in the grand scales of things. But It wasn't this statement that prove to be Jesse Jackson's Nigger Moment but his rebuttal. He issued a statement to Obama by saying: "I reaffirm my commitment to vote for Sen. Barack Obama," See just like a nigger, to put his energy behind something he doesn't truly believe in. Note to Jesse, Don't support Obama b/c he's Black Support him b/c he's the best Candidate, Nigger!!
2 - Eddie Murphy
Edddieeeee!! Take care of your kids bruh!! Riddle me this, you rich than a mother, mother... yet you don't support scary spices kid, the kid you made out of wedlock. The one that made you divorce your wife. Yet you showcase your new chick, and her kids... Babyface's kids around town like they golden? If that ain't some nigger shit right there. Man take care of your kids man! FYI most "thugs" are thugs b/c their mothers are busy working their asses off b/c some no good man is out there being a man whore making more babies and not taking care of them, spending time with them or guiding their kids to be strong respectable adults.
3 - Brittney Spears
That's right Brittney Fucking Spears... again take care of your kids, you're in a custody battle to KEEP your children, yet you're acting like a no good, trifling baby mama, worst than that chick from Daddy's Little Girl. Every week you end up drunk on some magazine cover. No to Britt Britt you're a mother now, stay your hot ass in the damn house. If you're going to be a drunk ass party animal bring the damn party to you, go to the store get yourself a bottle of E&J or some Cisco and get throwed you don't have to do that mess in the streets while your kids are in the car. If people are saying K-Fed-Ex is better suited to raise kids than you... there is a problem. You might as well give those kids to Bruh-Man "IV" 5th floor. Niggers I swear.
Anyway that's my rant for today. Lets chat in the comment section I ain't got nothing better to do.
TO THE LADIES!! YOU WILL LOOOOVE THIS ONE! I am looking for some recommendations. Keep reading! BX got a sista all hot and bothered with that hand job piece. I started thinking of isht! My mind went straight to Ghettoland. I was perusing the 'net and saw some interesting images caught a few stories here and there. I found some "man candy" I wanted to display! Interesting points to make! Enter into the Temple of Ghettoland.
Why is Kelly singing this song? What da hell Kelly know about a ghetto. She has been rich since she was 16! This isn't even believable. She coudn't get a cute rapper? Chingy, TI, Black Ty(rese) or that Dipset nicca with the tick...always yellin' "aye/ahh!"? he's cute just has a little tick or something. He'll grow out of it!
In defining Ghetto is... What's up with the beads Tidal Wave Crust? Venus and Serena took theirs out that's a good hint that it's time to let them gooooo! Grown hardcore gangsta men shouldn't have plastic beads in their hair. Remember when Mack 10 had those red bow in his head. Ya ain't seen him since huh? Why does Christopher Dumberson still have his'ens? SIGH. His head looks like the day after Mardi Gras!.
Why does MJB look better as she gets older? She has a draggish look in the first picture! She is definately aging well!
Harder, faster, stronger,deeper... Is it me? Why does Kanye look like he is about to take a big one down the esophogus? Making him look more suspect minute by minute! Maybe it is me..my mind is in Ghettoland today!
Ohhhh Sweet Man Candy! I found a few pieces of man candy!!! Ladies enjoy...
mmm! peppermint
Dave Navarro
David Beckham
mmm! chocolate
Reggie Bush, New O-Saints
Dwayne Wade, Miami-Heat
Blueprint (myspace)
you all know this guy
Jason Campbell, QB Washington- Redskins
NC best Humble Pie maker, Mr. VSOP
A pimp named Slickback aka Jorge aka Kaing Ding-A Lang
Al Simmons-model, schoolmate
Puerto Rican Lover himself John Johnson
Dark Chocolate Mekhi Phifer
I have more candies but I will save them for later!! Please recommend a candy to display!
Three men (I prefer to call them boys) were arrested in Henry County, GA Friday thanks to a prank that only they found to be funny. The pranksters stole a mannequin from the fire department training facility (of all places to steal a mannequin you go right into the police's backyard?!), painted the dummy "black", spray painted KKK on the chest of the dummy, and then proceeded to hang it over the damn freeway overpass ... can you say mental?
This clearly shows that with all the fights against racism taking place today that some people will just never learn the meaning of respect. It's one thing to dislike a person due to the color of their skin, although it's wrong, it has become widely accepted throughout history that some people are just imbeciles that way. But blatant disrespect is something COMPLETELY different!! To hang a "black" mannequin from a freeway with the letters "KKK" on the chest of it is ... I'm at a loss for words here. I don't even know what to call it! No matter what you or I call it, racism lives on in America and it's apparent that it ain't leavin in a hurry.
So, those of us with decency and respect for all human beings should be sure to rock ALL BLACK tomorrow, September 20th, in support of equality for ALL PEOPLE!! Not just black people or minorities as some are making it out to be about, but for ALL PEOPLE!!! Yes, the Jena6 sparked this movement, however, it's been a long time coming and its time for those of us who truly believe that this is a good cause to stand up and do at least the minimum and show our support.
Remember when you would cut on BET and find videos (such as the one above) bumpin and you'd turn it up so loud that your moms would come out of the kitchen swingin a spatula tellin you to turn that "mess we called music" down? I guess those days are long gone and over with because I can't turn on the television without coming across some wannabe hot reality show that, in reality, sucks ass.
What is it about reality television that has us so enthralled? I, for one, am a junkie. There's no denying that. I love everything from America's Next Top Model to Flip that House. However if there were some quality television sitcoms that I didn't have to pay extra for (i.e. Weeds or The Wire on ShowTime ... damn thieves!) I'd sure as hell be watching that instead. I miss the days of music videos on Music Television, VH1, and BET. I would say we always have 106 and Park but that mess ain't permissible though ... they play the same ass pop videos day after day. And the kids in the audience is half of what makes that show unbearable ... they have no idea what midnight love or video soul is all about so watchin them do tha "souljah boy" makes me squirm a little.
I figure within the next few years or so music videos will be replaced by reality television shows for every artist out there ... I wonder what 50 will call his show ... "I make money ... Fuck you." What about Ludacris or T.I? If you had to pick a few of the top artists out there to give a reality television show to replace thier videos, who would you pick and what would thier show name be? Shit, if Flavor Flav can do it ... anybody can! And I think VH1 has proved that time and time again ... hence Brett Michels and The Rock of Love ... smch.
Back in my day I did a little modeling... Very little. A local designer asked me to be one of his models for a fashion show. I obliged, and just so happened I caught the eye of this model who got a glimpse of my MANXILLA while I was wearing these pants made from some of the thinnest fabric ever created by man. During the after party and a few drinks later she asked me if she could touch it. We drove to the Motel for a short stay where I got some decent head & some mediocre pussy. But during the car ride I got THE WORST HAND JOB EVER!!!! Now many years later I've come to the conclusion that females don't know how to beat a dick. So here is a guide on the proper way to give a hand job.
Be Firm
One of the many mistakes I've come across while letting a female's hand slide on my sausage is she doesn't hold it tight enough. Ladies dudes don't like loose pussy and for this film, or sex session your hand is the pussy so don't be afraid to get a nice tight grip, now you don't have to strangle it but apply a little about of force to it. We like it tight!!
The Fast & The Furious
Men like to fuck, and fucking is fast, hard and furious. So if you're nice soft hands are wrapped around my dick, go hard or go home. A loose slow hand job really does nothing for me. It's okay to switch up speeds but come back w/ some speed and then slow down. It's just like if you were using your hips to change up the tempo of the love making, only this time your wrist is the driving force of the action.
Practice Makes Perfect
Most women nowadays give head, so while you're on the D, let your mouth guide your hand. Make it wet b/c lubrication is IMPORTANT! This action will get your hand in the motion of how to properly glide along the penis.
Advice From An Expert
I actually had to seek professional help for this blog and sought out the help of a Beat It Consultant - Kina Kara aka Jia who offered up a technique she liked to call the Hurricane. Ladies you clapse your hands together and go back and forth while going up and down. Simulating the movements of a Hurricane. Jia adds"dudes love it Esp if i kinda fuck with the head while im doing it"
There are many other tips i can put out there but we all know people don't like to read... and plus I'm a whore for comments so Ladies & Gentlemen Lets use the comment section as a place to exchange tips for pleasing our partners. Who knows you might learn something.
The following blog was written by my co-host the great Won Fish Too Fish Read Fish Blew Fish. It's his latest stroke of genius so check it out and enjoy it like you came up with the idea. You might also want to listen to the show we did last night.
Until then
What The World Needs Now
is peanut butter and effin jelly.
Ladies and gentz... I have to break my non-writing streak to bring you my latest moment of genius.
I present to you... directions for making the soon to be household famous
Upside Down
Peanut Butter
&
Jelly Sandwich
1. Find the right bread: traditionally white bread is used (think "Wonder Bread" or "Bunny Bread") but for several reasons a multigrain/whole wheat is better for your health:..:NAMESPACE PREFIX = O />
o White bread isn't as sturdy and the jelly soaks through (remember your grade school field trips with prepackaged lunches? no good.)
o White bread is extremely processed and lacks vitamins - why not make this delicious and healthy?
o Multigrain adds its own flavor that complements the sweetness of the jelly and peanut butter.
o When choosing whole wheat, make sure the bread is 100% whole wheat flour, not 100% enriched whole wheat flour.
2. Choose your peanut butter. You'll need to decide between chunky or smooth. Chunky can often be harder to spread, as it can tear the bread. But it does add a nice crunch.
3. Choose your jelly. Not every flavor will work -- most people like grape, strawberry or raspberry.
4. Get a good amount of peanut butter on a knife or spoon (this amount varies with your personal preference) and spread it out evenly onto one of the slices of bread.
5. Wipe any residual peanut butter from the knife onto the second piece of bread.
6. Scoop some jelly onto the other slice of bread. Again, the amount is up to you, but when in doubt, use less rather than more. Jelly tends to squeeze out the edges and drip if you use too much. Make sure to spread the jelly evenly.
7.
Gently press the two slices of bread together (facing the sides with the peanut butter and jelly towards each other).
8. Turn it upside down
9.
Cut sandwich. This could be in half crosswise into two congruent triangular slices, in half across the shorter width into two rectangles, into fourths either of these directions, or into as many pieces as you want. Enjoy!
This shit is funny as hell, i was waiting for Kanye to throw a hissy fit for losing this too!! lol But this makes me think of all of the funniest skits and non skits to come on the tv in the past few years... Let see there was
Back in the 90's I used to mess w/ a self proclaimed Lying Ass Libra, fast foward to late last year, I met another lying ass libra by way of a sex crazed blog groupie. Yes, that's right Blog Groupie, apparently there are some females who will let you do the "ATLANTA mouth smack" just b/c you host a blog with a lot of traffic. Anyway shorty was a pathological liar, but me being a sucker for a good screw, failed to pick up on all the signs that a female gearing up to tell a bold face lie. Now I'm not talking about the standard lies females tell like: "This is my hair" or "My eyes really are hazel" or the infamous "I haven't had sex in 3 years" SMCH try 3 hours you no good, filthy cum sponge soaked in bile. but here are some tell-tale signs that she's lying.
Her Lip Gloss Is Popping
One thing females do when they lie is lick their lips... Think about it? Do you find yourself unconsciously licking your lips right before you tell a fib? This is because of some scientific change that goes on in the female body which causes the mouth the get dry and that lip gloss to no longer be popping, so she'll start to lick her lips like it's Mr. Marcus's Dick, and swallow like they do on the cartoons when the evil villain walks into the room. GULP!! What Had Happen Was
Dudes what I'm about to tell you might seem unmanly, but choking a chick (not to be confused w/ choking the chicken) is never cool. Ask questions!!! In my day I have crept with a lot of ladies who had a man and they would all tell me what they told him to get away. Most of their reasons were they type where you think... and he believed that shit? But if you ask a question, and she's lying... she'll probably answer you w/ another question like "What does Tasha need from the mall? or "Why am I working out in Thongs?". Now if they don't question your question she might hesitate before continuing the delivery of the subject of her sentence. Throw Them Hands UP!!!
Another key to if she's lying or not is to watch her hands. It's a natural fact that people show emotion with their hands. So you can put your money on the fact that she's if she's not moving her hands or if they are stuck in her armpits then she's probably hiding something from you. If you see this immediately grab her by the shoulders and shake the shit out of her... Nah I'm just playing but if her hands aren't moving, her brain is more than likely moving a mile a minute trying to remember the details of the story her and her girlfriends put together which would probably be equip with alibis, witnesses, and hard core evidence... but don't believe it. She's lying... I can smell it.
All in all females lie, just as much as men if not more, so trust your gut...and if you get hit w/ the "You're not my DADDY" hit her w/ "Neither is that nigga who lives in your house and fucks your mother", then Yuuuuaaaaa and do the superman on that... On the real simply pay attention and open up the kind of truthful and loving relationship with your lady b/c unlike men, most females are not going to lie, cheat or stray unless you give them a reason.
I am not exaggerating today only facts! It's Sunday! Ain't no half Steppin...HIT IT!!!
Rap superstar MnM announced he is in the studio cooking on some projects and one of the concoctions could be a follow-up to "Encore."
Da hell you waitin' for here's the encore! M&M is in the studio cooking on some projects and one of the concoctions could be a follow-up to "Encore."
Are you as curious as I am? What happened to MnM? Ya boy DeShaun "Proof" Holton died and he disappeared. It must've been hard to bear when his "My Buddy" left him. To honor his death MnM finally got rid of Hailiey's mom, Kim! Yay! maybe we don't have to hear anymore songs of him stuffing her in the trunk, but rather song of playdates, chuckycheese parties, and Disney trips. The two who married again in Jan. of this year filed for divorce a 2nd time 3 months later. However, this time they parted ways with hankerchief tied to a stick, a pound, and a kiss that only Lil' Wayne and Baby would appreciate.
In the meantime, Eminem is working alongside several artists on his Shady Records roster, most notably Stat Quo and Ca$his. Keep some chapstick by ya side ya just never know when daddy's gonna want some shurga! MUAH!
I use to love this show!!
The B.I.G.D.A.double D.Y.K.A.N.E, Doug E Fresh, The Worlds Greatest D.J. Cash Money. Ed Lover and Dr. Dre, MC Shan have linked up with Puma to launch a clothing line after the MTV classic show, "Yo! MTV Raps." I'm gonna cop these!!! The line debuts on Sept. 15 (yesterday). Check it you know how retailers front and only release this type of stuff in major cities! BOOO! SO, I did some checking and found most of the gear is sold in different markets based on the celebrity. Kane has more distributors than Ed Lover and Dre. You will have to go to the site PUMA and hook it up!
Limited Editions
Rap Trading Cards...WOW!
Clydes
Aiight! This is the perverted monk! Remember Jena 6 on 9-20-2007 in Jena, LA protest and march! Go to Jena. If you can't go wear all black. I'm outtie 5000----> zoom!
What's up! I'm here to rock ya with the exaggerated truth! So get out ya hearphones and turn up the volume/ I got that underground hip hop/ a joint to make ya head bob/ This kat called Blu brings the flow real hard/ He's got something for errybody/ the joints to move ya body/ or stimulate the grey in ya noggin'/ I had to review him on this blog/ ...and/ check him out on the 'Space/ ...and/ don't hesitate to add him to ya friend's list/...then/ get them fingers to movin' and pimp'em/ make it happen. Spread the word and support a real lyricist/ cop the album. Hooooruah!
Ok! I am so feeling this album I felt like doing the Carlton!
Blu expresses the good and bad times of an MC goes while trying to maintain life and a music career. This album is BANGIN'! The beats are authentic, the lyrics are sincere, there is passion in his delivery. It's what Hip Hop Heads thought basement music would be, want it to be, what it ought to be. Blu & Exile's sound remind me of "The Coup's Genocide and Juice" a little. Back when MC's didn't have budget or expense accounts and they got their friends to be in their videos! Those were the days are they coming back?
There aren't too many tracks I didn't like. There were some verses that hit me I included them under the track, in the track listing. Click Real Hip Hop to hear the full album or click a track on the player. Enjoy!
1. My World Is ... I love this track it is a true throw back
2. The Narrow Path
3. So[ul] Amazin' (Steel Blazin')
4. Jucien' Dranks (feat. Taarach)
5. In Remembrance of Me
6. Blu Collar Workers
7. Dancing In The Rain
I say cool, but the truth is I’m stressing a grip/ Cause it’s hard to make music when this depression exists/ They say use it as inspiration – the best of them did/ But I just MC, I can’t handle this pressure for shit/ And if you ask me, stress is a bitch/ My girl needs more pretension and my record label’s desperate for hits/ Now I’m pissed ‘cause I’m getting out the zone again/ Makes me start to dread when I see a microphone and shit/ It ain’t supposed to be like that – I said ‘I’ll be right back’/ I left the office, got on the phone and called my partner Jack/ And I asked him, ‘Remind me why I’m rappin’’/ And right before he answered, I remembered my passion in the past/ When I was scribbling in my tablet/ To box out my mom and dad scrappin’/ To help me when my grandmother passed/ Plus the many times that I was homeless/ At the times that I was broke, this music made a way when I was hopeless/ He told me to remember the rain and to diminish the pain/ And he told me not to ask him again/
8. First Things First (feat. Miguel Jontel)
9. No Greater Love
10. Show Me The Good Life (feat. Aloe Blac & Joseph)
I got a call from my girl last week/ She telling me about that time of the month and how it may not come/ Dropped the phone right before she said I might have a son/ And I started asking God how come/ I got dreams I ain’t reached yet – ends that ain’t meet yet/ When it comes to being a man, shit I’m barely getting my feet wet / Trying to hit reset knee deep in debt/ Trying to figure out how to feed a mouth that ain’t got teeth yet/ How the hell am I gonna show a child to be a man/ When I’m twenty-two without a clue on how to take a stand/ Against this system when it’s just us/ Wanna show ‘em justice/ But last year I was just in cuffs/ What the fuck am I supposed to do when he’s telling me ‘Dad I need some food’?/ I’m looking down at my stomach and mine is grumbling too/ What can I tell him when he’s twenty-two/ And he’s asking me what the fuck I was thinking when mommy’s tummy grew?/ Was I scared, was I getting prepared?/ Or did I even think of leaving her without a father’s care?/ Should I tell him that it’s hell here and life ain’t fair?/ Or should I try to make a change when he’s pulling on my leg?
11. Simply Amazin'> My Gooodness...I feel this in my soul!
12. Cold Hearted (feat. Miguel Jontel)
13. The World Is (Below The Heavens) Pt. 1
14. The World Is (Below The Heavens) Pt. 2
15. I Am ...
16. You Are Now In the Clouds With (The Koochie Monstas)
TI & PSC on the Set of his Next Video Hurt in Atlanta, GA
Some TI Pics for the ladies, so don't ever say I never did anything for you!!! lol Anyway it's Saturday Post some link, and let everyone know what's hot... Basically here is your chance to promote your blog!
**Sniff** Man you smell like Phys Ed!! Smell is one of the most Important parts of hygiene. Smelling good is vital so picking the right cologne could make or break a potential holla, Job offer, marriage proposal and more. Recently I was scent hi-jacked by my mother. We were driving into NYC, last month and she insisted that I put on this mystery oil she pulled out the glove box of the Benz. I said no, she said wear it, I said no, she said Wear it, I said No I already Have something on... She pulled over on the side of the road, pulled out a gun, held it to my head, hogged tied me and splashed the stuff on my neck... Okay Maybe she didn't do all that but I ended up w/ this oil on my body and seeping through my pores, mixing w/ my Dolce Gabanna Blue Cologne. What are your favorite scents to wear?
It's Xilla, I'm back once again after a 2 day mini blog vacation. Actually put in some OT b/c my birthday is coming up in 2 weeks and I refuse to be broke since the birthday falls during rent week. I'm getting old, but no fret I'm aging like wine and my life is getting better by the minute... but I'm scared. Scared that I might be that dirty old man my mother always cut her eyes at whenever she took me to my step-father's barbershop to get my gumby, high top fade w/ 2 parts or HI-Low Slope sculpted ever other week. I noticed the problem when I was cruising the web for content for the site and found myself staring at my monitor for an hour straight looking at this picture.
Yes Rihanna seems to have gone through a growth spurt. (Noticed I said Rihanna and not that Planet Formerly Known as Pluto.) I've noticed as I got older my will to resist the pig like urges inside of me have damn near disappeared. I remember when I could walk by a woman whose ass was so fat you could see it from the front and not turn my head to catch a glance of the plump roundness of her onion booty. But these days I'm breaking my neck to glance at the rumps of females passer byers.
I remember one of the few times I seen my father, I had gave him a ride to the local KFC to get some chicken. We had just spent the whole day kicking it and shooting the shit. He had just recovered from being hit by a car and had been drinking all day when he got the sudden urge for some CHICKEN! We walked up to the counter and he ordered his meal w/ a beverage adding an extra dollar to the order. He came back to my spot in line and what was an attempt at a whisper said... "I wanted to tell her I wanted some of that TITTY MILK" as he proceeded to laugh in an old perverted way. I swear from his laugh alone you would have though he creamed his pants. I just shook my head as the girl looked at me and I apologized w/ my eyes.
Needless to say I didn't eat my food that day, I just knew there was a spit special encased in that bag. But I find myself not being able to resist staring at boobies when a females talks to me, or glances at asses and saying damn. No one ever says anything so I justify it as the female wanting the attention... I mean why else would she wear that super v-neck top that shows 85% of her bosom? Or those extra tight pants that cup her ass? I would write more in this blog but I'm ashamed of myself. So I ask the ladies who read BlogXilla.com how does it feel when you know a guy has undressed you w/ his eyeballs had his way w/ you and didn't even bother to give you his name?
The video is off the chain, but just a little advice for you. Please don't try to lean w/ it and rock w/ it anymore... Didn't think I caught that did you? Stick w/ that same 2 step spin cadence you've done w/ every video off this album and you'll be good. But for the record it's Snap, Twist, Lean, Lean, Twist, Snap!
Plies, talk like he was once a field negro who picked the least cotton of all masters slaves
Akon, looks like he would shoot you, kick you in the balls and then go home and cook Boiled Goat Tongue for his kids
Did Spike Lee direct this video? I haven't seen that Float walk camera trick since Do The Right Thing
Since when have parking lots become the new place to be? I know whenever I go to the club there are a gang load of Po' Po' telling me to keep it moving.
Man, Yall remember when Ja Rule was the sheezy fo' shneezy? Oh, I remember "Holla Holla" was wack back then, but when he started actin' Niccabuttfool, ya kinda yearn for the wack "Livin' it up" days, those "Thug Lovin' days and I kno'ya gettin' bored chillin' wifthenfenem...I know you miss my lovin', but thugin', Thug lovin'! Ha-Haaaa!" Featuring Bobby Brown with his Tourettes style of singing...Yellin' out random isht. "SKITTLES"! JA....THEY GOT SKITTLES!! IT'S MURRRRDA!
I had to reach back in the days! This is when Hip Hop was on it's last leg. When Ja was saying a little piece of something. I hadn't heard from Ja after he got his tail handed to him by Busta, Em, and I forget the other dude. Dang--it was 50 shintz, his part was so forgettable compared to Busta and Em. 50 ripped Ja with wankster. I digress.
Ja is speaking out at the Congressional meeting and he had this to say: "They got my man Doug Morris under fire and S#!t they got him going down to go speak to Congress about hip-hop lyrics, are you F--king serious?" Ja said. "There's a f--king black kid right now about to get 25 years for having a fight with some white kids over hanging the nooses over the white tree, let's get to that. Let's get into sh-t like that, because that's what's tearing up America, not me calling a woman a b--ch or a h-e on my rap songs. And if it is, then we need to go step to Paramount, and f--king MGM, and all of these other motherf--kers that's making all of these movies and we need to go step to MTV and Viacom, and lets talk about all these f--king shows that they have on MTV that is promoting homosexuality, that my kids can't watch this sh-t," he continued. "Dating shows that's showing two guys or two girls in mid-afternoon. Let's talk about s--t like that! If that's not f--king up America, I don't know what is. There's a lot of issues we can address besides hip-hop, but they want to put everything on us like we're the problem," Ja added. This is going to be a shameless f--king plug, but I said, 'when everyone wants to point the finger, and ask why there's so much corruption, they only need to look in the mirror.' It starts with themselves."
I don't know whether to say Ja is a homophobe or what. At the least, I am proud of Ja! Granted he doesn't know how to treat women, still. Hey ya gotta start somewhere. After posting "unforgivable" can I really talk. Yes, I can, but I won't. At least he is finally speaking on something worth talking about instead of Murda Sinc(ing). If he can get up off his arse and do something you can too. So check it:
Yo, It's Friday and a sista ain't trying to work all that hard on today, soooooo. Since folks don't like to read more than two sentences with a pic to follow Imma'bout to hook yall up. Very little reading and a few pictures that run consecutively, also called a video. My mic soundz nice....are-you-ready HIT IT!!!
Word, I ain't gonna talk yall to death today ain't much happening in the entertainment world. If some breaking news pop off I will hook yall up!!! I found these two joints on the "tube that is you," (youtube.com). I was crying laughing...I thought you would enjoy. If you don't, well forget you then. In the words of Eddie Cane an'em...."I got nuthing but love for you baby!" (c) Five Heartbeats
The New LiL Wayne and Kanye- ALL I DO
I found this fool by mistake. Dude's teeth are faulked up!! Try not to look at the teeth****ADVISORY THE HUMOR IS CRASS AND STANK! IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED DO NOT CLICK PLAY....BUT DAMMICH IT'S FUNNY! IF YOU LIKE IT I WILL POST THE ENTIRE SERIES EACH FRIDAY!
My birthday has offically started!! For the rest of this month I am celebrating my birthday. Birthday's haven't been to kind to me when it comes to gifts but I always buy myself something extremely nice and this year I want this...
If you care to chip in, you can donate a few bucks to my ipod fund my clicking Chip In 2 bucks will do, but more will get you a favor from Xilla, maybe even a banner or website layout. Thanks for the gifts.
What da deal is my people! Once again....for a second time. I bring to you the Exaggerated Truth in Entertainment!! Without futher delay let's get to the foolishness of the day....HIT IT!!
Kanniption In the Lead.....
Billboard has learned that today's SoundScan Building Chart indicates first-day sales of 437,000 for West's "Graduation," 310,000 for 50 Cent's "Curtis" and 107,000 for Chesney's "Just Who I Am: Poets and Pirates."
Retailers now contributing data to the Building Charts include Trans World Entertainment, Best Buy, Borders, Circuit City, iTunes, Target, Anderson Merchandisers, Handleman Co, Ray Ray’s BBQ, Lakeisha’s Hair and Nails, and the CDman. Anderson Merchandisers, Handleman Co are rackjobbers that place music into mass merchants, including WalMart's stores. Ray Ray’s BBQ, Lakeisha’s Hair and Nails, and the CDman are just robbers. It is estimated that Konniption will surpass his August 2005 release, "Late Registration," by 750,000 units. Late Registration was the last album to start above that mark. It stooped at No. 1 on The Billboard 200 with opening sales of 860,000 copies and led the chart for two weeks. BOOOOO! (billboard.com)
No Baby!!!! AWWWWW Dayum!
When you think of Foxy these days you are wondering about the baby or the prison sentence. Well she ain’t pregnant. So, I guess the only thing left is the prison sentence. Oh yeah….she has bad album coming out. Let me stop because I haven’t heard it yet. LOL. REAL TALK: Let us admit since Chyna Doll nothing she has released has been as great. :REAL TALK
Originally due Dec. 4, Foxy Brown's first album in six years, "Brooklyn's Don Diva," will now arrive Nov. 20 via Koch/Black Hand Entertainment. The first single will be "Don't Surrender" featuring Graf. WHO? Brown completed her first post-Def Jam album prior to being sentenced last week to a year in jail for violating probation in an earlier case.
"This is just a temporary situation," the rapper says in a statement. "I made my bed and have no problem lying in it. (It might be a little hard; full of bugs and my cell mate might try to rape me in my sleep…) My will is steady. What doesn't kill me will only make me stronger."
Brown's manager, Chaz Williams, says despite the artist's incarceration, "Brooklyn's Don Diva" will not be delayed (huh?). He also insists Brown is not pregnant, contrary to media speculation. Chaz is an idiot "the album will not be delayed." When the title of the article he commented on is that the album is gonna be delayed. This is why she sucks. She has sucky people speaking for her.
Take dat…Take dat… Ring Off
Sean "P. Diddy" Combs gotta give up the bling for inspection for an assult case bought against him the first to report the story was TMZ.com. Gerald Rechnitzer claims that Puffy hit him in the jaw between 2:00 and 2:30 AM on Feb. 25, 2007 as he was leaving a post-Oscar party at Teddy's nightclub in Hollywood. Supposedly, Puffy wanted Rechnitzer’s girlfriend to leave with him [Puffy] and his entourage. OK Stop!! Now, at this point Kim Porker Imma need you to take the chil’ren and run away from that fool Sean Combs because not only does he have big teeth, he allegedly sucker punched the Rechnitzer, pushed the girlfriend and spit at another female member of their group. Ewww! Yet, he will not do nuthin' for you [Kim] Imma need you to think. A motion filed Monday by Gerald's lawyer, Michael M. Marzban, says,
"Needles to say, Combs does not wear simple rings ... the rings he wore when he struck (Rechnitzer) are important and critical to the bio-mechanics of this case."
Comb's lawyer, Hillary A. Jones, declined to comment on the statements in Marzban's court papers.
Deeeezeeeee Nuuuts!
Reverend Al Sharpton and The Activist Crew borrowed from the Isaiah Washington and snapped back at a rapper's filthy insults. Rev. Al' office responded to David Banner (Levell Crump), who expressed his deep "hatred" for Sharpton by amiably inviting Al to "suck [his] d*ck," along with other offers, submitted to hip-hop news reporter SOHH.com. Kirsten John-Foy, one of the leaders of the Rev's National Action Network, submitted to the site,
"From time to time we do encounter people that have sexual fantasies about Reverend Al Sharpton, but they are always women and Crump's proposition is a first. I am sure Rev. Sharpton would not call Crump the "N" "B" or "H" word ... [but] despite Crump's personal request, I am sure Reverend Sharpton would not call him a f*gg*t."
Rev. Al confirmed that John-Foy's response was in fact sent from his office, but added that Rev. Al would "never" respond directly to comments like Banner's and he would never use LustraSilk’s Pink Oil on his perm. It dries his hair out.
God don’t like ugly…and you sho’ is ugly!
As previously reported the female rapper Remmy Ma (Remy Smith) was arrested in July on attempted assassination charges (really, it was murder but unimportant people get assassinated too) after she allegedly tried to assassinate Makeda Barnes-Joseph, by shooting her twice in the torso, for allegedly stealing $3,000 out of Remy's purse. The case has not gone in front of a grand jury as of yet due to slow progress in the investigation.
On August 19, Remy Ma (hence forth called Dummy Ma) apparently saw the boyfriend of a possible witness while at a club in the Bronx. Upon seeing him, Dummy allegedly had a group of homies to try assassinate him, resulting in the man suffering a black eye and a fractured bone in his face. A friend with the potentially assassinated was also injured, with a broken jaw. The man reportedly has had a metal plate put in his face and was required hospitalization for a week.
Spokesman for the Manhattan D.A, Edison Alban revealed that Dummy Ma is now facing charges of gang assault, tampering with a witness, intimidating a victim and third-degree assault as a result of the nightclub incident.
As reported by the Associated Press, Dummy Ma contacts witnesses to remind them of the street code of ethics
Dummy Ma and friend called witnesses to discourage people from taking the (witness) stand." Remy's lawyer, Ira Fisher, has said that his client has plead not guilty to all charges. The rapper is scheduled to be back in court on September 20.
You remind me of my Jeeeeep!
Buffie will try to squeeze her behind (YEAH I’M HATIN’!) on the web cam for her own web-based reality show. ExlusiveCast.com will team with BuffieTheBodyondemand.com, to give Buffie her very own web-based reality show.
"We are very excited and pleased to have a great personality like Buffie The Body to launch our first product in the entertainment industry,"
George Mercado, CEO of ExclusiveCast.com, said via a statement.
The 20-minute episodes will consist of various situations and events that will give viewers an "all access" (PORN!) look at the model, showcasing her everyday life and activities (PORN). It will probably be something akin to Emmanuel in Space, do you all remember that joke of a show. Phish! Buffie was also reportedly given full creative control over the show as well. So expect it to be horri-blay! Dumb viewers will be able to subscribe to the site for either monthly or yearly access to the episodes at a not worth it sum of money. The site, is currently in negotiations with several other celebrities; such as Gary Coleman, Jean Claude Van Damm, and Steven Segal, for reality programs.
Buffie is most known among hip-hop audiences for her appearances in music videos for Tony Yayo and her butt's cameo in the movie ATL, starring T.I. and Big Boi. She has also had layouts in such magazines as XXL and King. This is not the first time Buffie has appeared in a online reality clip. HMMM wonder what she was doing? PORN?!
I’m outta here. See ya tomorrow Same Perverted time, Same Perverted channel. Don’t forget Jena 6 MAKE A DIFFERENCE This is the Perverted Monk bringing you the exaggerated truth in hip hop!
"Exaggeration of every kind is as essential to journalism as it is to dramatic art, for the object of journalism is to make events go as far as possible.”- Authur Schopenhauer, German Philospher
Anime and hip hop....I love it! Let's take it back.
Am I seeing things? Or is NY bout to get down wit a damn midget?!?!?
Now I know majority of the black women out there who hold themselves to some standards were rather embarassed by the portrayal of Flavor of Love's New York aka Tiffany Pollard. And even though I was mad devestated at the image she was feeding into all across white america, that black women are loud, demanding, and only after what's in a man's pocketbook, I couldn't help but to watch with enthusiasm ... but then again I'm a reality T.V. junkie, I have a serious problem.
So I'm just goin on about my daily agendas when I open up my email only to see this ...
And I need y'all to tell me ... is it me or do I see a damn midget in the front row?!?!? Could my eyes be playing tricks on me?!? I sure do hope so ... but I received numerous confirmations that yes, this is indeed a "little person" in the cast of I Love New York 2. sigh ... and I thought I was embarassed before. Not to say that a "little person" isn't worthy of the affections of the muppetesque looking Tiffany Pollard, but the fact that they'd even let this guy think he had a chance is what blows me away. We all know good and damn well she ain't bout to keep him around for nothing but ratings and it's a damn shame! I'm thinkin about protesting her shallow ass ... but then again my hands with that remote in them get a mind of thier own. I know I won't be the only one watchin. Check her out October 8th on VH1 ... the newest station providing you with coonery at it's finest.
What it do folks! This is the Perverted Monk bringing you the Exaggerated Truths of the Entertainment Industry! This is blog 1, so bear with me dammich! As we go a little something like this.....Hit it!!!!
You Can’t Blame Michael Vick for Dis One!
Rapper Trick Daddy (Maurice Young) was arrested after a fight at a strip club early Tuesday. He was charged with disorderly intoxication (wtf are they just making up charges?) and resisting arrest. Trick’s conduct was fine it was the intoxication that as difficult to arrest. The Authoroti (yeah, I meant that) arrived to “Tootsie’s Caberet” in Miami, FL. after 1am and found Maurice beating his chest asking someone to “C’mon kick my ass. I wish a nigga would.” It’s apparent that someone obliged his request.
He was taken out of the dog pit and driven to a hospital where he was treated for injuries from the fight with one of Vick’s pit bulls. His label, Slip-N-Slide Records, declined to comment on the future of the Slip–N-Slide and the sucky nature of Trick’s albums "Thug Matrimony: Married to the Streets" and "Back by Thug Demand." If I were the streets, I would ask for divorce immediately. Speaking of Streets….
The ILL Clank-Clank
Foxy Brown (Inga Marchand) will not see a street for 365 days because she violated her probation. Foxy originally was sentenced to the probation after an assault on two employees at a nail salon in Manhattan. Sources say, if she can look just like “Miss. J Alexander from America’s Next Top Model, she has chance to leave prison before the baby’s born.
FOXY or MISS J?
MISS J or FOXY?
Hell, Foxy might pull a Nicole Ritchie and do a one day stint because they look like twins! Based on the sketch, Foxy has a very good case that it was not her that assaulted the salon employees, rather it was Miss J from ANTM (America's Next Top Model.) Miss Attitudinal is going to reside in the plush setting of Riker’s Island with a view of the Atlantic Ocean. Decorated by Jail Queen herself Martha Stewart.
Cell Living by Martha
Foxy may want to watch Prison Break’s first season since Judge, Melissa Jackson slammed Foxy's pleas for mercy, calling her,
a "great actress," and saying that if this were the first time she'd apologized, she might be believable, but not now.
Foxy was angered by the verdict, and retaliated by spitting at the judge, on the lawyer, and hocked a big loogie on the paparazzi. I am kidding, but wouldn’t it be a great story ???. Look for TLC’s A Baby story: Baby Marchaund Reppin’ Riker’s Isle.
T.I. Same thang Popping!
T.I will be releasing a movie with co-stars Big Dris aka Idris Elba from “The Wire.” It’s gonna be like Ocean’s 11 meets Boys in the Hood! Yeah, that’s a new concept…can we say Dead President’s ‘07?
50 scents and Chyanne
Based on presales and the pre-orders 50 Cent is outselling Kanye West by about 20,000 units in the preorders. The count is 339,079 for 50 and 319,212 for Kanye. No one in America cares about Euro sales, but they count too. This week 50 Cent is headed straight to Europe to promote his album. I hope the winner get a flight to outer space where they will get sucked in to a black hole and disappear!
Parental Advisory: Sit Cho’ass Down Somewhere!
Yah know! I am all for parental support of the chil'ren in the entertainment industry, but some folks take it too far. Be-Be K’s (Beyonce) dad stood on the sidelines and let baby girl switch, twirl, and pop her booty into riches. These new fandango parents are making lyrical cameos on their kid’s records. Who, you ask? Exhibit A: Lil' Mamma’s grown ass daddy! Granted her mom was in Lil' Mamma's debut video, "Lip gloss ," but she wasn’t spittin’ lyrics. LE SIGH. Click and see. Daddy is the Curtis Blow lookin’ nukka that chimes in near the end.
And then...(sighing heavily) there is Exhibit B: Hurricane Chris freaturing momma, “MC No Top Teefs!” I was thinking is Boss coming out again? No? Maybe it’s the manly looking chick from “Total!” Remember her? She had the same hair style. Witness it for yourself.
Because Submitting is like --Hard!
In the new issue of Essence magazine, Keyshia Cole is talking about her former relationship. He was a man with a 10-year-old son. WOW! Talk about prolific words. First, was the son. Second, was the carriage….. she said she was dating the man for a year and a half. Third, she broke off it off because the man wanted marriage. She didn’t name names, but could it be the Snowman? Young Cheezy….I mean, Jeezy?
“I just couldn’t do it. It’s weird. After this guy proposed to me, I was like, dang, this is everything a woman lives for: to be married, with a ring, to be able to represent something. But for me, it was the opposite. I was scared. When you get married, you become one; you don’t live just for yourself anymore. I’m just not ready for that. I’m not done with my goals in life. What’s the word when you just kind of fall back and let your man do the man thing? Submit? I’m all jacked up on that word. I just couldn’t submit. But I loved him. That’s the crazy thing about it. It’s been hard because I really missed that child.”
This Betta be a Good Damn Secret!
As G-Unit adds to its members with no albums roster, newest member Spider Loc reps the west coast with the release of West Kept Secret: The Prequel (Baymaac/RBC/Koch). Spider Bite..I mean Spider Loc uses his laid-back flow to bring subtle realism back to Los Angeles gangsta rap. It’s gangsta but it’s not all in your face like, “REP YO’ SET FOOL! REP YO’ SET!!!” It’s more like, “Attest to your neighborhood! Attest to your neighborhood!,” but in a gangsta way. He keeps to his hustler status without flashing meaningless rhymes (there is nothing more meaningful than all the blue innuendoes), and he does so without getting up in your face. G-Units Lyrical Joust…Spider Pig..dangit Spider Loc and The Game? HMMMMMM…
You be the judge and tell me what you see wrong with this vidgeo!
Keep Your Ear to the Ground
Remember when hip-hop would spark a flame in your soul when the beat dropped. You use to get old tapes and stuff the grooves at the top so you could record songs off the radio. Music don’t move us like that no more. Now we gotta Robocop and Roosevelt. Do you want to know who real in hip hop and who’s not? So do I! I started with R.E.U.B…this katz rhymes take you back to the days where great production, lyrics, and beats was important to the song. Get this you can even hear the D.J. cutting, scratching and transforming in the background. This is straight reminiscent of Pete Rock and CL Smooth, or Big L. To hear some of his music go to: R.E.U.B (pronounced like Rube)
Errrrr… Could Master P be the Next Vice President?
Hell Naw! But, talk about a 180. Master P (Percy Miller) has always been a shot caller but he is doin’ big things for real T.I. can’t touch him right now. Master P’s new look pictured here at Obama’s Presidential Fundraiser, hosted by none other than the filthy rich daytime TV hostess Oprah Winfrey! Master P released a statement that he saw the light and the error of his ways. Now that he has made millions exploited everything he could in the music industry he sees how the music he created was not a positive image for the African-American community. He vowed that he and his son Lil Romeo would change their image and represent blacks in a better light. Well, thank you Percy. That’s what I have waited all my life for your character change [insert rolling eyes]. Better late than never, right?
I gotta go don't forget to wear all black on 9-20-2007 in support of Jena Six. If you don't know the story www.colorofchange.com. Sign the petition...get involved! This is the Perverted Monk Bringing you the Exaggerated Truth in Hip-Hop!!
"Exaggeration of every kind is as essential to journalism as it is to dramatic art, for the object of journalism is to make events go as far as possible.”- Authur Schopenhauer, German Philospher
Kanye West Album... if you didn't get the bootleg then this is what it looks like. Speaking of Mr. West He blacked out at the VMA's like to hear? Here it go
Being the Sexual Intellectual that I am, people always ask me what gets the ladies in the mood. I've come to find out that it's a number of things and all women are different so there isn't one thing that a man can really do to get a lady in the mood, so as a man we must know how to do a plethora of things to turn the complicated female species on. Those things are as followed, men take notes.
Get Your Grub On
A good home cooked meal will do the trick. Learning how to cook will get you more pussy, than a nice car, an expensive chain, and all the gadgets you can afford for one simple reason, It gets the girl to your house. So my theory is invest in a cook book. The instructions are simple and since most people can order pizza by them self a good meal could get the panties wet faster than you can say flap jack on boobies. If you need a nice recipe shoot me an e-mail.
Let Me Rub You Down A sensual massage after a night out or a hard day of work can go a long way. Lets just say your lady as a stressful day at the office. She left out of the house feeling and looking great in those new Christian Dior Pumps and her boss in a perverted power trip had her running around the office making copies and delivering memo's all day. She walks in the door and you have a bottle of belvedere, fresh fruit and some body lotion from Victoria Secret waiting by the couch. You pop the DVD of that romantic comedy she's been talking about but never had the chance to see... or even better Season 2 of Sex in the City. And rub her feet w/ the scented lotion, and run your powerful hands up her legs, to the small of her back, her shoulders and neck and turn your living room into a wonderful Spa. The panties are coming off.
Talking Dirty After Dark
Females are like men in a lot of ways, but the Lady laws keep them from letting it out, but try this, the next time your girl says I love you, simply do the following. Say "I love you too" then mouth the following words (meaning don't say them outloud) "and I want to fuck the shit out of your right here". Talking dirty to your girl is a sure fire way to turn her on, send her naughty text messages throughout the day about how you're just thinking about her, and want to do all sorts of things you saw on the porno you purchased over the weekend. Described in detail the image of her riding your face that popped in your head during lunch, tell her how you can't wait to grab her ass while you're entering her from the back. Tell her you want her.
Now these things might not work for all women but the key is knowing the woman you're fucking. And if you pay attention a lady will tell you, show you, and inform you of the way she wants to be treated, so pay attention and put an action plan together and you can be at the controls of when you're lady is in the mood.
This is the first weekly Caption this contest. The Person w/ the best caption of this picture will receive a custom made banner for their page or blog designed by Yours Truly.
Here are the rules.
Leave a comment, more than one if you feel the need to
Readers will vote by leaving a comment w/ their favorite caption and the word vote.
Winners will be announced the following day.
Last Night the MTV Video Music Awards Trumped football for me b/c I knew I had to mention them on the blog today and I must say The Young Boy Chris Brown made it all worth it. (Pause) Breezy put on a show and tore the building down. He started off w/ a Charlie Chapman theme and from there the building crumbled. I remember one summers evening I had a long conversation w/ my homegirl Ms. Hurt. She said that Omarion was a better dancer and the next king of R&B and 20 minutes later I couldn't believe i had actually engaged in a debate over teeny bopper R&B stars. But I must show respect where Respect is due. And Chris Brown was the HIghlight of the show.
Did you catch the awards? What were you favorite moments? Too bad they didn't show the Kid Rock, Tommy Lee Fight. Men please stop fighting over pussy... It might save your life.
One of my close and dear friends is the smartest person I ever known in the whole wide world but he puts himself in stupid positions. Now since he doesn't read my blogs I can put him on blast. He was once involved in a weird love triangle on the campus of Rutgers University. And one day on the bus it happened he got caught with his main chick, and his chick on the side. What's funny about it is that his main chick, isn't as fly as his chick on the side.
You might not get this but let me describe the Chick on the side, a hard working straight A mulatto girl, not that being mixed makes her better looking but shorty comes from a nice family, and she is now one of Wall Streets top movers. But the main chick is... well since this is my boy I won't bash his girl and we never know she may read the blogs. But one winters evening while drunk out of their minds my boy and his main chick decided they were hungry and wanted to go to the student center to get some wendy's so they hopped on the bus to go there and it happened.
Both ladies were on the bus, and the story as told to me is not entertaining, but hilariously funny. Both girls had suspicious of each other but never had proof. Honestly my boy had it pretty damn good but as he sat there sitting right across 2 chicks he was banging down he simply smiled. His main chick got closer marking her territory and he played it off with a wonderful move i like to call the PPIF (Play Punch in the face) he mushed her w/ his fist and a Bruce Lee sound effect to the jaw. Weird but it worked. Small talk was exchanged and dirty looks were passed around but at the end of the day... They all still exchanged bodily fluids and knew nothing about it.
So hmm how would that have gone down if all parties weren't smart and cool headed individuals obsessed w/ not letting people in their business? Would it have went down any different if this was you?
There is an unwritten law in all office buildings that states, if you see them together then they're fucking. I know it's not always true, but if you see 2 co-workers eating lunch together, sitting at a table, or riding in a car together then it's pretty safe to say... They Fucking.
Back when I was in Jersey I used to go to lunch w/ this girl, and the office just knew I was fucking her, you hear the "Oh they're always together." or " I heard she did it to him in the supply closet". Little to everyone's knowledge I was fucking the chick on the other side of the office which i was never around for this very reason. But WORD is the most contagious plague around b/c it spreads like the new gout.
Rumors got back to the chick I was involved w/ and you couldn't tell her I wasn't Sleeping w/ the girl in the blue cubicle who never wore pantyhose. Now take the pictures posted in this blog. Is it a great photo op? or did Fiddy pay paris to ride on his magic stick? At first glance, one might think they are hollywoods new interracial super couple. But I beg to differ. Because I've been linked to many a female in my day, some of who only read my blogs. I mean from leaving comments to sharing a number 2 at Mc Donalds together. Why do we tend to think if they are together... They Fucking.
We all have them, you've have crossed paths w/ them one time or another, maybe while at a cookout, as you reached for the last scoop of Big Mama's Tata Salad, or at the club after you pumped shorty full of drinks and you were just getting ready to take her home and put Xilla Dressing all on her salad if you know what I mean and they show up... I'm talking bout trifling ass friend.
The cock blocker, who pulls your card and purposely slips up and gives a vital piece of information about your past w/ the sole intention of embarrassing the hell out of you. "Hey Malik, so did that Rash clear up or does it still burn when you piss?" or "Damn she looks way better than Tasha I'm glad you left her ass at your house."
But please don't think this is a trait only contained in the male DNA it plagues women as well. Ladies you all have that hoe friend, the one you'll let, borrow your bra's, eat up all your food, watch the kids but under no circumstances would you leave that HOE around your man for a millisecond.
I wonder what makes people do messed up stuff to their friends? Is it a chemical imbalance which eats away at all the rationality in the brain? (Crack Head > The Trifling Ass Friend.) At least you expect a crack head to steal from you, but your Friend? What makes it worst that sometimes it's not even a friend sometimes it's family member who will come around and fuck your boo, steal your last dollar or worst drink the last bit of Kool-Aid and eat the big piece of chicken.
Last night I stayed up extra late watching "The Wiz" on HBO. I remember the rumors of them remaking the movie Starring Ashanti as Dorothy. But my mind started to wander, who would I cast if I was to remake this film. First to mind was T-Pain as the Tin-Man, since he wants to buy you a drank, who else to lug around that can of oil. T-Pain>Nipsey Russell they sort of look a like too don't they? Next was a no-brainer, Chris Brown should pick up where Michael Left off and play the Scare-Crow, this moves on the dance floor to his skinny frame makes him perfect for the part. And as the Cowardly Lion... Kanye West, after copping pleas of not wanting beef w/ Beanie Sigel or Fiddy, I figured we could drape the Lion in the hottest fashions and have his Skittle Hop around the screen for a couple of Hours. But then it hit me... Who should play Dorothy?
Lil Mama
Sure her lip gloss is popping but could she really carry this role? The role that the legendary Diana Ross played so well? I mean yea we could change her magic slippers to magic lip gloss and have her poke though luscious lips out all throughout the movie, but who wants a gang load of pissy R-Kelly wannabes outside of every theater in America....
NNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEXXXXTTTTTTTTTT!!!!
Solange
Beyonce's Little Sister - Ummm sure her father has a lot of power and could probably make this film huge and a blockbuster success but she's like Preseason Football or season 3 of Flavor of Love to this blog... Totally Irrelevant . If I casted her in this role I would be worst than the people who want Sean Stankson to play Biggie. I'm not hating I'm just saying.
Rihanna
Hmm Big Forehead, gives us the perfect reason to shoot the entire movie w/ a Fish eye lens... And now that she's rocking that boot around... ahhh Perfect she could A-Town Stomp the shit out of the Wicked Witch... And w/ the Stars on the back of her Neck - The Planet Formerly Known as Pluto would be my choice for this role. So Ri Ri sign on the dotted line!!
Yesterday, one of my Readers left me a comment on a subject that I want to touch on... I will write about it, But I want to open this up to you guys b4 I write my Brief Essay on this subject matter, I want to know what your opinion is... Does it really Matter? Is it That Important? How do you feel. Below is what she wrote and I will Highlight the Questions I would like for you all to answer.
SHE WROTE: i have a conversation to share with you ..
my girls and i were chatten last night .. and a conversation came up about faking orgasms .. when it got down to the nasty of it .. most of us were willing to fake at those times when we
a.) for what ever reason just couldn't cum b.) just tired and done ..
however - what started the discussion was the "heroic" measures men will go to to make us cum and we just end up sore & raw .. one of my girls said she'll say to her man "baby, i'm good .." n' he'll be of the mindset .. "ahh hell no .. ur gonna cum tonight.." we all looked at each other and nodded our heads to a moment like that .. when we were cool with what we had already gotten .. so .. to everyone's surprise .. we all almost in unison said .. "fake it" .. he'll be happy - think he did a good job and u can back ur ass up to him n' get some snugglen, sleep - whatever .. another said .. "i wish someone would holler at these men and get it through to them what makes a woman cum and when to let it go" .. a few said "gurl, i tried to tell my man when enough is enough but he just is determined .." "i tried to tell him what feels good; what to do but he thinks he know's me better .." "mine is not happy till i cum so he can cum ..." "my man doesn't give a damn .. once he cum's .. he roll's over.." and we all said "awww poor boo" together ..
so - i said .. i know the man! blogfather .. at least on myspace he has the powerful fingertips to put the word out!
holla out to the men some stat's .. 13 women last night .. came to the following conclusions .. 11 outta 13 didn't cum from just intercourse .. and the other 2 that did had cum already by oral/hand/toy before cumen again with the slide in .. 7 of us cum from only oral .. 12 of us from hands/toys .. 1 of us just doesn't cum due to her diabete's medication .. there are times when the grind n' slide is enough .. 10 of us were able to have multiple orgasms if the moment started slow n' easy vs. hard n' fast .. 6 of us can find our g-spot only if in doggy style - we agreed men's legs outside not inside .. only 2 of us could cum while rodeoen' .. and we all cracked up and clicked our glasses together when 13 outta 13 said the top three favorite positions .. 1) doggie 2)69 3) to be on top rodeoen' facing away from ur guy .. LOL ... we all said when we get dry during .. rather then spit .. let's us get up and get the ky .. one said spitten on her clit turned her on ..
the bad news for the men .. only 7 of 13 like to give head .. only 5 of us will swallow and enjoy it - 2 like to give head but no swallow .. 1 of us suggested to get the dick all sloppy and slippery as a turn on to slide ur hand at the same time .. 13 outta 13 agree men don't know how to or not enough time on kissen anymore .. 9 outta 13 think the bigger the better ..
the margarita's must have kicked in 'cause the rest of the stat's are a blur on my napkins .. opps .. my bad ..
peace out .. ..
feel free to add any bits of information you want and after I gather all of the info I will write a letter for you ladies to give your men... So you won't have to fake it and you don't have to end up w/ your kitty kats all sore...
Imagine you just broke up w/ your boo, and you don't know how to get them back... and then a song comes on the radio and totally explains how you feel. Well This is the same thing, Right now our country is in 2 wars, The one if Afganistan, and The one in Iraq. Most people can't tell you why we went to Iraq. Listen to the video
Top 5 Thing to Say To the President
~Mr. Bush probably did not know that, with his own words, he had already proved that he had been lying, is lying and will be lying about Iraq.~
~A man with any self respect, having inadvertently revealed such an evil secret, would have already resigned and fled the country! You have no remaining credibility about Iraq.~
~Mr. Bush, the only "hypothetical" here is that you are not now holding our troops hostage. You have no intention of withdrawing them. But that doesn't mean you can't pretend you're thinking about it, does it?~
~You can fool some of the people all of the time, can't you, Mr. Bush? You are playing us!~
~this president has ceased to listen. This president has decided that night is day, and death is life, and enraging the world against us is safety. And this laziest of presidents, actually interrupted his precious time off to fly to Iraq to play at a photo opportunity with soldiers, some of whom will on his orders be killed before the year maybe the month is out.~
Moment of Niggatry - The Game is Going To DisneyLand
TMZ is reporting that The Game, real name Jayceon Terrell Taylor, arrived in a Los Angeles County court today to face charges of making a criminal threat and possession of a firearm in a school zone. Apparently dude is is all giddy b/c he knows that the bloggers of the world will be giving him a little press. Click here to see The Video. - But this video is today's moment in Niggatry b/c only a nigga would be facing felony charges and say they are going to...and I quote "ride all the rides at Disneyland."
Irv Gotti, Stopped by Wendy Williams, to let the world know that he had Ashanti first. Wendy Williams is a trouble maker but I applaud her for saying the stuff everyone wants to know. Let's face it we live in a nosey society. I know in my day I have went through some lengths to keep who I'm fucking under wraps. Like the time I parked 3 blocks away from shorty's house, walked around the block, through the woods and climbed through the window so no one would see me... No it wasn't that serious but I did it anyway. But in Honor of Wendy's Williams Lets Tell someones Business... Don't use names, just simply leave a secret in the comment section, feel free to go anonymous if you like. But we want the dirt
British model Danielle Lloyd has filed a defamation lawsuit against The Daily Mirror for claiming that she had sex with 50 Cent. Apparrently she wants no part of the bullet ridden rap superstar, she claims that the stories have damaged her professional and personal reputations, and that she has suffered distress and embarrassment. Damn Fiddy, Chicks don't even wanna be rumored to be sexually engaged w/ you. And after what he did to Vivica's non existent career can we blame them?
But This Model has a history of this, The Daily Star Sunday (another newspaper) alleged that the 23-year-old "feared a secret sex tape could ruin her" following a "steamy romp" which she initiated with a DJ to whom she had just met. So Today in Your Honor Danielle Lloyd, this songs for you...
Ebonics Might Save Your Life - The Ghetto Handbook
So I get home from work and My home girl Feoshia brought something striking to my attention. Apparently on AUGUST 31, A crude "ghetto handbook" distributed to police patrolling Houston's public schools has resulted in the suspension of one officer. The booklet, which was given to about 20 cops, is subtitled "Wucha dun did now?," and purports to help the reader "learn to speak ebonics as if you just came out of the hood. My heart hurts as I think of the poor image of blacks portrayed by the media, and blacks them self who add fuel to the fire by wearing their pants below their asses and speaking like they skipped every English class on their schedule. Inside the pamphlet they break down words which we use on an everyday basis, such as:
Aks - (ax - axed ) - To ask a Question
Befo - (b-fo) - Before
Outy - (audi) - Bye
Hoodrat - a scummy girl
This brings me to an another article written by NSENGA BURTON where she writes "i think that teachers are often scapegoated for poor student performance, when in fact, many students across race, class and gender lines, do not want to perform...., many want to be well-dressed and well-coiffed, but not challenged" she goes on to state "Others cannot be bothered with the minutia of school, like homework, class assignments, and extra-curricular activities. Their disinterest in school reflects our society's disinterest in education. We go back and forth over vouchers and diversity issues, which are important, but the real problem is that many of us do not truly value education."
I mean think about it, there is a disastrous stereotype ruining the Afro-American race which claims that a little black boy w/ a book is trying to act white. I know some of you have heard or said that someone who talks proper talks white. By saying this you give in that being black is some how improper. I don't understand why a lot of blacks salute ignorance, and "ghettoness" as a favorable trait. I try to tell every young person that the hood mentality gets no play when they get older. At least from a woman or man who is worth being involved w/ on a relationship level.
But, yet my heart feels as if this stereotype is a double edge sword b/c it's these qualities which makes the black urban race unique and special. The use of the N-word, and transforming the ER into an A does hold a special sort a swagger which can be found in the coolest of folks. In a perfect world all blacks would be able to turn this feature on and off w/ ease. I know we all saw Michael Vick struggle to sound proper during his press conference, is it the fault of the teachers for not reaching our youth? Or is it the fault of the likes of BET, VH1 & MTV for the mass promotion of Ignorant black folks digitally enhanced into our living rooms every day? Or maybe, JUST MAYBE its our own fault for fueling the flames of this dreadful image, this cancerous stereotype eating away at all of the progress MLK, Malcolm X and W.E.B. Du Bois made in their efforts of Black Equality. But at the same time lets not forget that in their day, the day of our greatest leaders , they had doubters, and ignorant black folks who were poisoned by the oppression of OUR GOVERNMENT against its own people, who they classified as second class citizens. Lets prove them wrong!!!
There has been much racial activity and tension as of late. It is scary! In time where you think black and other people of color are finally waking up! You find that they opened their eyes long enough to turn over and go back to sleep!
It makes you wonder if people are committing these insane crimes against one another in a tit for tat racial match. You OJ we get Jena, You get Rodney King we get Sean Bell. Hmmm Sean Bell...Mychal Bell??? I am not saying that is what going on. I am however pointing out some facts that just seem too eerily close to a conspiracy! For the sake of saving the future our race [the righteous] maybe we should make pain staking strides to implement a lesson like this one!
A sensual massage after a night out or a hard day of work can go a long way. Lets just say your lady as a stressful day at the office. She left out of the house feeling and looking great in those new Christian Dior Pumps and her boss in a perverted power trip had her running around the office making copies and delivering memo's all day. She walks in the door and you have a bottle of belvedere, fresh fruit and some body lotion from Victoria Secret waiting by the couch. You pop the DVD of that romantic comedy she's been talking about but never had the chance to see... or even better Season 2 of Sex in the City. And rub her feet w/ the scented lotion, and run your powerful hands up her legs, to the small of her back, her shoulders and neck and turn your living room into a wonderful Spa. The panties are coming off.
