I Had No Idea You Were That Dumb08.04.08

One night a group of my co-workers got together for the Negro past time, a night of drinks and spades. At the time I was sleeping with this light skinned girl, with a butt like Bria Myles who worked at my job. She was beautiful, but she has the brain of a 7th grader. [No offense to 7th graders] That night while playing spades, a hearts lead there was a duece, a nine, and six laying on the table we need one book to not to get shot, she throws out a 5 of hearts. Another suit plays and low and behold the ace of hearts comes flying out of her hand and we lose the game. That night, I banged her like I hated her.

Top 5 of the dumbest things said to my Twitter friends by their bf/gf

Number 5When telling this dumb ass that I was sick of him being so “vague” he said, “What? Is that even a word? Or are you making it up? – @Savvyfatty

Number 4 the dumbest thing a boyfriend has done was constantly asking if there are any refills for drinks at every restaurant. Always – @mzvirgo

Number 3after sex w/ ex, I went 2 wash up & noticed nut. I asked him if he nutted n me, he said “u cant get pregnant from anal sex” we werent havin anal sex but his dumb ass thought we were, so I got knocked up. needless to say, my son will be celebrating his 10th bday in Oct =) @CathrynMarie

Number 2 - He called another girl while I drove on the freeway. Then actually got out the car when I pulled over and told him to. The latter was the dumbest. He was snickering and such as he exited. Guess he didn’t think I was going to really pull off… @Marleaux

Number 1while trying to loose weight my ex girl told me that she drank a slim fast with every meal. Lmao @ThisIsMiguel

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Posted in Battle Of The Sexes, Entertainment, Niggatrywith Comments

Top 5 Text Messages To Send After Sex07.30.08

My home girl and one of my 5 bloggers who could get it, Hot Sauce sent me an email asking a simply question. “Xilla… What are the five best things that you can text someone the next day after an amazing
booty call.” Now I can’t honestly answer the question from a female perspective but I can tell you the 5 best text messages I received after a booty call.

  1. “I’m still dripping”
  2. “I love the way you feel inside me”
  3. “So all those things you write about ARE true”
  4. “Thanks for walking me to my car”
  5. “Don’t put me on your blog”

Top 5 Text Messages I’ve Sent

  1. “You so nasty and I love it”
  2. “I can still smell you on my face”
  3. “You scratched off 50% of the skin on my back”
  4. “Just think we get to do the same thing tomorrow night”
  5. “Told you so”

Top 5 Twitters Sent After Sex

  1. “Where are my panties”
  2. “I woke up next to the prettiest female I’ve ever had a one night stand with”
  3. “Damn, girl, that was incredible. You want something from Waffle House?” – Randyexclusive
  4. “cigarette any1? I cant walk over 2 get becuz pipe was put down in my bedroom last nite” dee dee
  5. “UPDATE: another earthquake. Oh wait. That was just my bed.” – Sugarlips

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