Model: Suraqah

Reader Submission: Written by Miss Dimplez For BlogXilla.com

We all have that ‘friend’ who we like; that one friend that you wouldn’t mind committing to, sexing up or simply being more than friends. Like a car stuck in neutral, you’ve got to kick it into drive, reverse or park it; you just can’t stay on neutral for too long. We’ve all been in situations like this, and just like toilet paper attached to the bottom of your shoe, you never notice it until it is too late. Here are five road signs to pay attention to on the way to the friend zone; hopefully you can detour or plan your trip accordingly…

1. Conversation. According to Power 98.3 Radio Jockey, Karlie Hustle, “I will make it clear through body language and conversation topics, that I only want that person as a friend.” If your conversation is limited the impersonal gist you can carry on with someone you met two seconds ago on the elevator that is the first sign that there is no deep emotional connection.
2. Body Language. When it comes to body language, it all depends on the person’s culture. Self distancing when conversing, hand shakes over hugs, and over relaxed or non-chalant body posture when conversing. Before you rush off thinking that a hug means that the person is ‘feeling’ you, take into account that in today’s society hugs are a very common way to embrace a friend; therefore lack of hugs should be a sign.
3. Time and Effort. According to, OneHunnidt, “The amount of time and effort put into communicating, getting their attention, and letting them know you’re thinking of them is key.”. If there is no effort made to contact you, no text message, instant message, email, or phone call… that shows you are not their priority when it comes to communication and they need not put effort into your ‘relationship’.
4. Conversation Topics. Things like referencing you to siblings or talking about people who they’re sexually interested are indicators… If they mention fantasies of people like Juelz Santana or Beyonce, because those are celebrities who are idolized and the likelihood of them having that encounter is low, they do not count. Now if they talk about someone from their daily life who they would love to have sex with, be aware, take note.
5. The Direct Approach. In case the line between friend and more has been muddled by mixed indicators, a variety of conversation topics, changing body language, and mixed efforts… there will be a direct approach for distinguishing purposes. Dependent on the person this could take days, weeks, or even months to occur. According to AZ Socialite, Britne Starr, “I’d probably say something like, ‘You know you’re my friend right? Nothing more, nothing less’.”

No one said the friend zone is a permanent situation. It is just very hard for someone to travel down that road and make a U-Turn. Save yourself the trip and pay attention to the road signs. Even if you do wind up being stuck in the friend zone, it’s not a bad thing. Just don’t expect above whatever that friendship entails.

Miss Dimplez

So I’ll avoid the obvious joke here … “Loon has gone Looney” (hardy har) and just say that this didn’t shock me one bit. Loon didn’t have much of a rap career to begin with, he got features on Diddy songs and some others herer and there, but the sad part was he wasn’t a ‘bad’ rapper. Just poorly managed.

I first chuckled a Loon’s beard and Muslim garb…but when they split screened the video and put clips from Loon’s videos, I couldn’t help but laugh seeing Diddy harlem shaking in the camera as Loon is trying to profess his love for his new lifestyle… *lol*

Under the cut you will find Itsthereal’s latest video ( a diss to Vlad TV) and XXL’s I Know Rap People: DJ Drama vs. DJ Whoo Kid

-1AM

Best I Ever Vlad from jeff on Vimeo.

…..They PLAYED Vlad TV !

It’s happened to all of us before, maybe just one time, or maybe every time we go to the club, the drunk person. Breath smelling like hot garbage freshly dropped from the as* tunnel of hybrid version Macy Gray and T-Pain. Loud jumbled non-sense spewing from their trap and no clue of what the word no means. They always want to do something that starts with the letter F, from Fight, F*ck or Fly. But how does one deal with the drunk person? Here are a few tips to keep you entertained instead of annoyed.

1. Make Stuff Up – One thing I like to do when I encounter a drunk girl is talk real slow and say the same thing over and over again, but make sure that the same thing you keep saying is a totally unrealistically LIE. I once told this drunk girl with yellow teeth that I was The Vice President of The Lifestyle Condom Company in New Jersey and I was here on business. Told her I wrote 7 best selling books for the New York Times on how to roll and dispose a condom properly. She ate it up big time, like a fat kid at a Buffet. She wanted to give me her number bad so I gave her a random card in my wallet told her to write her number on the back, and then handed her the same card as my card.

2. Ask Them Stuff – Not even an episode of Dave Chappelle is as funny as interviewing a drunk person but here is the key, you have to ask them the most outlandish questions on the face of the earth like “If you were a Chicken with Super Powers what would you use for transportation since chickens don’t fly”

3. Sleep With Them - The look on their face when they wake up with a hangover, and no idea of who you are… Priceless. No I’m just joking, never sleep with a drunk person b/c you might end up in a semi 2 girls 1 cup situation if you know what I mean. Nothing is worst than getting thrown up on.

How Do you Handle The Drunk Person?

Now I have had my share of good and bad cooch in my days, I remember when I first had sex w/ this one girl as soon as I stuck it in I heard music, started seeing hearts, moons, stars, clovers, horseshoes, pots of gold, rainbows and red balloons yep all of the lucky Charms. Even the special limited time only Lucky Charms. I was shaved bare nice and warm inside.Damn! Sorry I had a flashback.

The Characteristics of Good Cooch are as followed but are not limited to: Warm, Wet but not too wet, tight, juicy, sweet, stays warm and wet, can be maneuvered by the owner to do all types of cool tricks like squeeze the magic stick or be rolled around and thrown back at the person and is trying to dig deep inside the cooch… Kinda like that sting ray that Stabbed the Crocodile hunter in the heart!!! Hey we know good sex is when your partner is Killing it.

Also equally important as the feel of P U S S Y is the scent of it, for that I’ve made a ranking scale of scent.

Smell of the Pussy…

• 0 – No scent or the scent of her favorite body Spray

• 1-3 Very light smell of pussy… you know the kind that you eat it and you can go around smelling your upper lip the rest of the day or night!!! or is that just me?

• 4-6 Borderline Stink… This could just be a bad day for her… Maybe she just came home from the Gym in which could be fun depending on how you feel about her. Won’t get ate but would get stuck!!! If it’s a jump off then she will be asked to leave the premises like TI (you know ASAP)

• 7-10 HEFFAH YOU STANK!!! GET THE HELL OUT DO NOT PASS GO OR COLLECT $200 MATTER FACT HERE I’LL GIVE YOU 200 BUCKS TO LEAVE!!! EWWWW FISHY WOO WOO this tends to smell like TUNA FISH and Bacon BITS!!!

Good COOCH will have you doing crazy things like paying light bills or coming over at 3 am when you know your licence is revoked. It may include, using your last bit of money to take her to the best restaurant in town instead of just going to Mcdonalds or KFC like Rihanna & Chris Brown. or paying GA POWER bills!But I’m sure you get my drift.

So my question is do you have the Goods? Do you know a female whose got the goods?

I love this shirt  because for some odd reason it reminds me of Beat Street. When Ramo died due to stepping on the 3rd rail. But anyway lets boogie!!

Lee: [Lee explains about how he got arrested for dancing] Hey, Mom, these fools busted us for dancing, can you believe that?
Cora: I believe you better shut your damn mouth before I decide to leave you down here.

$24 @ Huebucket.com

Lil Wayne took back the beat everybody tried to rape and laced an A Milli Freemix as he called it where he thanks his fans and says he’s that guy from Reading Rainbow but only him in Roots. Kunta!!!!

Lil Wayne – A Milli Remix

Snagged from Nah Right

“I’m a monster I sleep whole winters wake up and spit summers” Jay-Z

$21 – Hanging With The Crowd – Allmightys.com

“I’m a monster I sleep whole winters wake up and spit summers” Jay-Z

$21 – Hanging With The Crowd – Allmightys.com

“I’m a monster I sleep whole winters wake up and spit summers” Jay-Z

$21 – Hanging With The Crowd – Allmightys.com

“I’m a monster I sleep whole winters wake up and spit summers” Jay-Z

$21 – Hanging With The Crowd – Allmightys.com