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Women Who Won’t Date Men With Kids Are The Scum Of The Earth
Posted in Relationships on 09. Dec, 2009
Women are selfish, insecure and petty, but the worst part is that men give them a pass for these retched crimes about humanity. Almost every woman I know claims they refuse to date a man with kids. Any woman who outright refuses to date a man with kids should have her vagina pulled from between her legs and thrown out like the public option in the health care bill.
Recently on twitter, I asked women if they would date a man with kids, the responses blew my mind.
Trish declared she would never date a man with kids because half of their money goes to child support. The computer screen reeks of selfishness. Regardless of if a man has to break bread for the benefits of his kids this shouldn’t be a reason to deny him love. Sure he might not be able to take a woman out to the fancy restaurant, but how come she can’t treat her guy to dinner, or go dutch. I believe some of you women need to look in the mirror and ask yourself why you’re so damn selfish.
Most say they don’t want to deal with baby mama drama, but what is the drama? Drama is only how much you allow someone to stress you out. I don’t allow anyone to stress me so why should you? And If a man is doing right by his baby mother and his kids than she shouldn’t have any reason to cause drama. So the reason isn’t the girl, but rather the man a woman chooses. If a guy has baby mama drama he is still sleeping w/ her.
If he doesn’t sleep with her, he won’t have drama. It’s as simple as that! As I look at these responses I can’t help but feel a certain way, because I know I am a good man, who has a million and 50 qualities to please my woman and treat her like a queen and the fact that my kid may cause a problem. The fact that my gift from God is an issue when it comes to me finding love, I can’t help but think it’s only the insecurity of a woman, who is not confident enough to thrive and treat her man like a queen because he has to be responsible.
I can’t help but believe that it’s the selfishness of a woman who wouldn’t want to share time with a child sent as a blessing in a man’s life. I can’t help but thing its petty for a woman to not give a guy a chance because of a lesser man might slip up and do some foul things. Yet even in that scenario I feel like it’s the woman’s bad choice in men more than it’s a man with a child.
i think your overlookin the fact [with baby mama drama] is that some women are just evil…the man doesnt even have to sleep with her..she could just be mad and cause drama bc HE isnt..and she may be jealous that he has someone and most likely she doesnt..lets be honest there are too many viscious ass people in the world the majority bieng women…
someone said
“Otherwise, men with kids are a turn off. I don't care what anyone says. Especially when you are under the age of 30 & you have more than one child. that says alot about you. Especially if you have more than one babies mother.”
This is a VERY VALID reason for women to avoid men with children.
Blogxilla, you were loved so well by one or two women that they carried your kids to term and are helping you raise them. If you couldn't manage to marry those women and make either of those relationships work, then any subsequent girlfriend has her work cut out for her. Maybe she'll be your superwoman, and maybe you'll just rent her womb out for 9 months and then bounce. You've established that pattern already…
Its not about a woman knowing what she wants and a woman who knows what she wants should be rational to decipher between a good man and a man that's bad for her regardless of if he has kids. Now surely the general statement is just to grab your attention. Please understand that. Now should a woman not date a hard working good man because he has a kid? probably not, I feel like that is dumb, shows insecurity and selfishness and it's damn right petty. Now if a woman wants to not date a man who has 5 kids 4 baby mamas and doesn't pay an ounce of child support than yes she has every right to do that. Matter of fact a woman has the right to date whomever she pleases and she if she doesn't want to date a man with kids that's her right too…
but and a big but if you look at these reasons via twitter and tell me the majority of the reasons aren't petty insecure and selfish… then more power to you. I would hate to look at the world through your eyes.
Well for the record on the single mother post… I say that blog was written by my brother and the views of that blog are not necessarily the views of me.
Secondly Like this blog appears to give a general statement that all women are scum, which is done purposely. It's just as general as saying I don't want to date a man wth kids. Which proves my point. I also wrote 13 reasons why you should get back w/ your baby mother, 15 reasons why you should date baby mothers and a bunch more blogs.
I write blogs on issues. Because I am rational enough to see both sides of the issue. You're entitled to your opinion and thanks for reading my thought.
I feel where you are coming from. 100% I do. My thing is this. To not date a good man because he has a kid.. it's selfish and as selfish as having children irresponsibly. Although the thought of someone saying I was irresponsible by having my child is stupid. Because although the mother of my child and I are not together my life, my creation or my child's life were far from irresponsible.
Sure it's easier to raise a kid together it can totally be done alone. My mother did it.
You're right, but also this has mad me stronger. I never in my entire life claimed I was perfect. Great, and super duper fantastic yes I am that… but perfect nope I'm not. but one thing I take great pride in is that I have learned from my mistakes I have never ran from them. I have never made the same mistake twice, and If i did.. I never made it a 3rd time.
We can't judge everyone by the same scale because people are different and people are not all the same. So to judge them the same is just wrong.
unlike alot of females, i WOULD date a man with kids, only if they have custody…they have more a different personality about them, a more loving kind if they are doing right by their kids…the baby mama drama is only going to get you upset if (this is what i think) the kid(s) are in the mother's custody instead of his.
I've written over 10,ooo blogs about a bunch of topics and yes some of them have been from different sides of the road. You know why? Not because I'm a hypocrite but rather b/c i'm a profession. You know it's the same reason Denzel can play a cop and a villain.
And Everyone is entitled to a preference but everyone's preference isn't valid. Kids wanna eat candy for dinner does that make them hypocrite too? Does it make them right? But I have written numerous post and i'm not going to name drop to prove myself I've written 13 reasons to get back w/ your baby mother. and number other blogs about the beauty of a woman w/ kids.
Read the tweets and tell me the majority of the reasons women claimed aren't selfish, petty and insecure. SMCH
This is sometimes hard to do because SOME men (not all) still sleeping with their babymommas which makes it hard for you to work on the relationship.
I would date a man with one child maybe 2 (if with the same person).
One less crazy bitch to deal with.
Blogxilla,
1. you were raised by a single mom, and
2. you have chosen to spawn two kids who are being raised by unmarried women.
Chicks who see you are not nec'ly judging these 3 generations, but
they are observing your family values.
Wow. Where's all the hate for the men who say the same thing about women with kids? If you're not a kid person you have no business dating someone with children. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I also don't think that discussion of kids needs to come up in the conversation if you're casually dating. I don't need to know about your baby unless you have plans on us meeting.
I may just be a little selfish but I've always preferred to date men without kids because should I have a child by any man, I'd like that child to just be ours, no shared DNA with others.
But I'm totally open to dating men w. kids now b/c as I've gotten older, I'm not sure I want them anymore.
“Any woman who outright refuses to date a man with kids should have her vagina pulled from between her legs and thrown out like the public option in the health care bill.”
Dang, that should happen to her all b/c she doesn't want to date a dude with kids? Wow. All women don't want to be mother figures. So should we castrate all the men who don't date women with kids or don't take care of their own children?
I guess im selfish..cause i jsut cant do it…im 20… i just always feel guilty cause i feel like this extra time he spends with me, he could be spending with his child…i dunno..i just dont want and dont have to deal with it…maybe later in life, but i will pass now… I agree with one of the girls…this does take the excitement and moment of giving him his first child…sigh…
I've had my fair share of dating men with kids & im not afraid to say I won't do it again. Im not being selfish on my part but I've dealt with too much BM drama to even think about doing it again. Not that it stressed me out in any way shape or form, but if you dont have an understanding with your BM that you two are NO longer comitted to each other, but comitted to the child, then she will always be the middle peice in whatever new venture you persue.
i agree 100 percent with inHIcotton, she summed it up! its a cycle in our community of having children out of wedlock, its greater if you were raised in that type of household to have children like that in the future if you dont recogniz its a cycle. Its so normalized in our communities and it does children a disservice…i commend you mom for raising you alone, hell my mom did it.But was it irresponsible for my mom to have me out of wedlock hell yea, will i do that to my future children hell no. i have purposely waited until im married to a great guy and honestly i would like to marry someone that was raised in a 2 parent household that understands kids need 2 parents in the home.i dont want to risk having a relationship with a guy that has had kids outta wedlock becauase obviously he has established a pattern of not working it out for a lifetime commitment with the woman that made the lifelong commitment to bear his children. and that to me is irresponsible. i would be scared to death to take a man seriously that has that pattern because i would be scared i will eventually be alone too.
Women Who Won’t Date Men With Kids Are The Scum Of The Earth? Really? What about the many men who won't date a woman because she's black? Or the wrong shade of black shall I say? It's all about your personal preferences. Quite frankly there is nothing attractive about a man with a child. N-O-T-H-I-N-G! I do not have time for the goddamn drama and I have no interest in helping a man raise another woman's child if something shall happen to the mother…Not my damn job! Any child that is not my own, I want no part of. I am young without any children, and I do not plan to have children until I'm married. If more broads had the same mindset, this wouldn't even be an issue, now would it?
It's selfish of you to get mad at women who don't want to deal with a man who already has kids, like they're obligated. Some people are really idealistic in wanting to create their own family & an unhindered life with their partner. So why should that woman lower her standards & forsake her ideals because it's not working to your advantage. It's selfish of you to say that the sole reason for a woman not wanting to date a man with kids is because she's selfish when she most likely has real, valid concerns that you should be able to take into consideration. You're selfish in expecting every woman to want to deal with your baggage.
@ yummi, cosign everything you said. Having kids out of wedlock needs to have more stigma than it already has, especially within the black community. It's become such a normalized thing now, that you have people like xilla ranting about women not wanting to lay up in the bed that they made. If a woman was raised in a two-parent household, seeing what a nuclear family structure is supposed to look like & was instilled with certain values, why the heck should she even consider you as a possible mate. You already made baby's mamas out of the previous women you dated, how do you know that woman doesn't want to be a baby mama herself?!
I think you are quite hypocritical to have such strong views regarding women not wanting to date men with kids. Did you not post a blog a while back listing reasons why guys shouldnt date women with kids (13 Good Reasons To Avoid Single Mothers). Should does men who chose to not want to be with women with children, be called out and stone to death too? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and preferences of who they want to spend their time with. Dont you have likes and dislikes of what you want in a woman? Shouldn't those women who don't fit your requirements call you “selfish, petty and insecure” then?? Your constant need to make those women who choose to not date men with kids feel like they are the worst kind of human being is really childish of you. As mentioned before, everyone (both men and women) have their preferences of what they want in a mate and they should not be penalize for their choices. Cause it's their life, and only they know what would make them happy!!! So you should not bully any woman into feeling that they have to date a guy with kids. If they dont want to, then they dont want to!! That's it!!!! Where I might give a guy who have ONE child a chance, I would prefer to not want to date a guy with multiple kids by multiple women. Mainly for the reason that if he couldnt make an honest woman out of the previous women who gave birth to his kids, how can I be so sure that he would with me. Now that's one of my reasons; if that isnt a good enough reason for you, that is your problem. This is not the Supreme Court, you dont need a full affidavit from me of why I feel this way. Now that isn't to say there aren't women out there who wouldn't date men with kids. There's plenty of women who will, but perhaps they are not your type of woman…..
I don't think women aren't dating you because you have children. You aren't getting a date because you are an azz.
i dont & wouldnt date a guy with childrens.. i jus cant find them attractive ..im always tryin to push guys back with their BM & kids lol like they should be, ur making families u need to stick with em ..guys with kids out of wedlock usually make more kids out of wedlock, i wouldnt want to be another BM added to tha list ugh..
when guys try to holla at me & i kno that they have kids i always get tha feeling “dont try to be with me go be with ur kids”..
i always want my 1st child to be my future husband's 1st child ..i dont want my future children havin half brothers/sisters….i have a half sister myself & when we were kids she hated me my brother & sister, she felt that we stole our dad from her ..when she would visit us, she gave my family hell..she was dangerous when she was around us..
anyway alotttttttt of these commenters feel the same way i do about this subject so i just clicked “like” on those comments lol
You know what's hilarious? A lot you are all up in arms about Xilla's generalizations and insults, but your own arguments, while valid to a degree, are chock full of generalizations and insults themselves.
So you're all just as bad as you think he is.
Not ALL men who are single fathers are that way because they had children out of wedlock.
They are not ALL irresponsible, even if that child is out of wedlock.
Not ALL of them want you to be mommy # 2 to their kids or even want you to meet their kids for that matter.
Not ALL “baby mothers” are bitches or crazy.
I personally think there's a better way for Xilla to get his point across without using generalizations and insults but it's not my blog, your arguments against his tactics would hold a lot more weight if you weren't stooping to the same low…
xilla i agree 100% with you on all degrees here. it takes a grown woman and a grown man to have a relationship where theres a child already established with either the male/female. my wife has been in my daughters life since she was 6months and we've now been together for 9yrs. The key is allowing your childs other parent to know youve moved on and that the other bs yall had going on is a dead issue. all that bm drama that these women talk about is their fault bc if they wouldve had a conversation with their mate about what they would and would not tolerate then it becomes a mute point. my bm tried my wife ONE time..my wife handed me the phone told me 2handle it or our relationship was DONE. that was my ultimatum right there either keep our shit tight or lose a good thing. seems like a lot of you women get in relationships that are fucked up to begin with
I rather be that scum then. I dated a few and all became bad endings that could have been avoided in the first place. Yes there are a few good men out there that are really good fathers and such, but I feel that if I'M NOT COMFORTABLE TO DO IT THEN I WON'T PUSH INTO IT. ITS MY CHOICE. Hey thanks for calling out names sounds like a funny theory. I'm selfish? Okay fine. I want the dream that my significant other and I establish real conditional love and great intimate friendship to the point of marriage, faithfulness, trust, loyalty, and sharing our most precious moment together of having our first child. Until that time comes, I will date, mingle, have fun while I'm young and managing life during these crazy times I'm currently dealing with.
You are an IGNORANT BASTARD! I recently found this site through one of my regular sites where people blog with intelligence instead of ignorance. I'm sorry to say she made a mistake even associating with this garbage. This will be my last visit to this site I just can't take the stupidity, however before I go…
Blogxilla you seem to have such a disdain for women! Why don't you just come out as the faggot you are and get a man and be happy!
I tried dating a guy with kids. He had two daughters and two jobs. At the end of the day, he was just too busy. And he was a procrastintor. His procrastination turned me off, along with the fact that he said that his baby's mother so called “trapped him” by having his second child.
I have no kids myself, but I know I pissed a guy off years ago when I said I don't date a man with kids. It's just a preference! It's not to say that it's his fault that he has kids.
What I don't like about dealing with a man with kids is the fact that he LIES about the situation with the kid's mother. He tries to make it seem like she's crazy and that they are not on good terms and that she's trying to keep the kid(s) away from him, when all along, he's still boning her, living with her, and having his cake and eating it too..the next thing you know, the woman is calling your phone and ask if you're screwing her man. No thanks.
I'm sure that there are good men who do take care of their kids. But the harsh reality is, the kid is always going to come first and you're going to be second.
When you're in a relationship with a man who has kids, your money tends to come up short because he has to pay half of his money out in child support. I'm currently dating someone who has 3 kids and child support eats one whole paycheck and $250 of another so he's left with $850/month to live on. He's a liability because of that & he has to go because MY MONEY takes care of me & my child, it ain't long enough to make up for what he has to give to his baby-mommas.
The author of this article (for some bizarre reason) feels that he is entitled to a woman's affection by simply being. He calls women who have certain standards “selfish, insecure and petty” and believes himself to be a “Good Man(TM)”, with 2 children born out of wedlock, and has this violent, misogynistic little gem to offer his readers:
“Any woman who outright refuses to date a man with kids should have her vagina pulled from between her legs and thrown out like the public option in the health care bill.”
All while dodging questions on the men who refuse to date women with children, and ignoring the valid reason that (despite the normalization of craziness in our community) some people actually have the audacity to retain their values and standards, and exercise their choices when vetting a potential mate. It boggles his mind that a women who desires marriage/partnership and a family (in that order) would, in her search, weed out a man who already has a family (and no marriage) with someone else…in fact, it angers him.
Ladies, watch out! There are those among us who wish to spread dysfunction. They want to see you complacent in a state of confusion. They do not care about your well being. They just want you to carry their burdens on your back so that they can appear to stand tall. Don't be fooled! Don't let anyone try to convince you of why you should, in any way, lower your standards and expectations…especially when they aren't so willing to lower their own.
Ok, hold tight cause men are the same way. They don't want to deal with women and their kids so why should it be any different? A lot of men don't want the responsibility, thus baby mama drama in the first place. And no baby mama drama isn't because the dad and ma are screwing, it's usually because somebody [usually the father] isn't doing what he's supposed to. My parents divorced when I was eight, and my brother was six. it's eleven years later my mother is still fighting my father for child support he still owes her. They've moved on, gotten remarried the whole nine. So you're off base on that one Xilla.
Second point:
I'm only nineteen, never been pregnant and I don't want children AT ALL. So if I don't want my own kids, why should I have to deal with someone else's? That's not fair. It's all about preference, just like you'd prefer to date someone who wants to be involved with your child, other people prefer not to be bothered with kids.
It's not selfish for women to not want to deal with another man's children. It's selfish for you to think they should though.
Sorry man! If a woman don’t want to date a man with kids, I don’t blame her. I don’t date woman with kids. Point blank.
By the way, I have NO children.
As a single mother myself, I don’t feel the way many of the women who responded do. I actually feel the opposite. I think a man who has kids is more likely to be more loving than a man who doesn’t. Because once you have children a whole other side of your heart opens up that you didn’t know you had lol. Now, aside from the downfalls, it can be a good thing. It’s when you start meeting people who say they DON’T want children or to date someone with children is where the problem lies. More often than not it is due to a selfish reason. I agree with you on that. But to say that a woman should have her vaj sewn up is a bit much. Not every woman is motherly, some women WILL date a man w/ kids but treat em like crap so…which would you prefer?
It’s odd to label a man irresponsible after he pays child support and takes an active role in raising his kids.
It doesn’t make one bit of sense to attack someone’s family values if they are making their kids top priority.
The “baby mama drama” only comes from women who do not make their kids top priority. If your kids are your priority, you will try to help them adjust to their dad’s new partner. Plenty of stepfamilies give healthy environments for kids.
Personally, if I see a man who always puts his kids first, I am going to feel a lot better about the idea of having kids with him.
Each person should be able to pull his or her weight in a relationship. I don’t need a man to blow $$$ on me – I don’t like blowing $$$ anyway. I do need a man who I can always count on who can pay half the bills and who I don’t have to support. I can find a deadbeat any day of the week.
What is hard to find is a man who wants to be a good father and have a healthy home environment for his kids. Too many of these fools leave the parenting to the mom.
I am female and no I just will not do it or consider it especially if it is more than 1 kid. Too much drama and multiple bm’s h*ll to the no. Most of the dudes that got all these different multiple bm’s are not taking care of their kids nor providing for them and the h*ll if I will be added to the list. GTFOH. I will tell you to keep it moving.
I’m 20 and the guy that I liked was 33. He lied to me and told me he was 27. He told me he lied to me beacuse he wanted me to like him even though he came with a lot of baggage. He just got out of a long term relationship and had 4 kids(which all have the same mother). That was hard enough for me but then he told me all of kids were under the age of 5.The kids were 5.3 and a set of twins who were 2. This was too much on my poor young heart. I was already upset that he lied to me, but all that baggage had me running. Plus to add the mother of his children was as crazy as a bessie bug!! What am I suppose to do, when we go to the zoo you take two and I take two?? And plus by him being older he was talking about he was ready to settle down and he belived I was going to be his wife. No the hell I’m not!! I still haven’t put my toes in the pool to test all of the water yet…
i think you’re being way to short sighted and narrow…. i don’t date men w/ kids because i want to be the first to experience parenthood with my mate. i also don’t want to deal w/ some extraside trollop for the next 18-49 som yrs…. seriously its not even worth it.
I cant say that I wouldnt; I will say that I prefer not to. All I can speak on is the men that You have to deal with the past present and future. The BM is the past who you have to deal with in the present only to carry her over to the future. We are waaaaaaay to old to just be looking for a present relationship do we tend to look for futuristic qualities. For instance co-parenting; where does it leave your wife and the children you will have with her; will your first children feel neglected because you are a part-time father with them and a full time father to the children in your household, is your BM going to complain about the time you spend dont spend. is she spiteful, is your “wife” allowed to bond with your child, etc. IT MAKES THINGS AWKWARD. If someone loves you then the will love your child but what if they only wanted to deal with you and not your child? I am sure that would upset you too… Put yourself in your “future wifes” shoes.
Its not that women DONT date men with kids its just easier not to.
i will NEVER DATE A MAN WITH A KID WHY SHOULD WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH AN EX ALWAYS IN YOUR LIFE AND US COMING LAST NO SCUM IS WHEN MEN LIKE U TREAT WOMEN LIKE SHIT BECAUSE WE HAVE A PREFERENCE AND WE ARE SMART ENOUGH TO STAY AWAY FROM YOUR DRAMA AND BAGGAGE
You can’t say that all women who won’t date a man with kids are selfish. That’s just generalizing us all. There are two reasons I won’t date a man with children. For one, I’m 18. I’m waaaay to young to be dealing with children and I’m inexperienced. Maybe when I’m older and much more mature I could handle it.
I also can’t date a man with children if he treats his children/children’s mother like trash. This shows he has no respect and what he’ll do to me if I end up in the same situation.
Because a man with 2 kids, by 2 different women that he has never been married to is irresponsible. That’s just nasty.
If you want someone to date, go find yourself another single mom. Dont get upset with the women who made smarter choices to not become another statistic. Get in where you fit in. Women and men who dont have children can afford to be choosey. They didnt make the choice or mistake of having children.
Celibacy is the answer to this entire problem people.
If everyone respected their bodies by dating without sex and stopped infesting them will babies and disease, relationships would be healthier in the long run.
There is a reason the bible tells people not to lay with anyone outside of marriage. Look all around you in our society today and you see the results of disobedience, deviance, vice and no physical and mental discipline.
The consquences are: Divorce, and single people impregnated outside of wedlock by destructive partners, because sex came too soon before anyone got to really know who they were bonding with sexually, bottom line. Consequence = std, pregnancy, abuse and eventually single parenthood.
And we would increase the likely hood of meeting child free men and women sans the baby daddy/mama drama, if we all had the sense to resist our sexual urges which lead to us throwing our lives and freedom away.
Sexual attraction is POWERFUL, it is like drug addict behavior, but if one fears the after effects, then one needs to resist it until we see the real side of the people we crave and desire to lay with, otherwise, you life can and will become a depressing nightmare.
Don’t do it. Live, don’t worry about sex. Get a vibrator or use your hands, people carry disease and mental problems.
We should all decide to pass on that and take our time to figure out which type of human madness we can accept and handle, then go at it from there. Just don’t be stupid!
I agree with the celibacy comment… but if you tell these same people that they’re dumb for having sex outof wedlock they will say “its normal, its the 21st century” but suddenly become traditional when it comes to having children before marriage. If everyone waited til marriage and did NOT divorce (because that palys a role in single-parent dating too) this would not be an issue. I might have a hard time not being someone’s first wife vs “not having his first child” just b/c I don’t believe in divorce and a divorcee has a track record of not working out a long-term commitment in a romantic relationship-which is the kind of relationship I would be entering into. I have a child, but bfore I did.. the only kind of man w/ kids I wouldn’t date is the one who does not love and take care of his children. With them you get a preview of how they might handle a family should you decide to marry him. If he doesn’t care for his children now, what makes me think he will care for and provide for our future family? I will say that a man can have no children and still be the biggest whore sleeping around with his ex. My child’s father cheated on me with numerous women whom he had no children with. So its not just the “baby mama”. If he is a dog then he will be a dog and “smash” other women whether or not he has children- women just suspect it more with the “BM” because they are intimidated by the “pre-established family” or w/e. Needless to say, I left him & am in a great relationship where my partner is actively involved in my daughter’s life. Her father is married now and is currently cheating on his new wife with women he has no children with…. NOT me whom he has a child.. but she like most women immediately suspected him of cheating with me because we have a child…. until she found out otherwise… and I have caused NO “drama” in his relationship. I will light his ass up though when he chooses not to take adequate care of the child he has with me. Its not drama, its a matter of a man doing right by his children.
The biggest problem is that to me, children to single parents represent a failed, dysfunctional relationship. Why else on earth would two people who came together to create life not do everything it takes to see that life through together? I don’t care how you try to spin it.
I’m currently trying to date someone with a child and it’s a struggle. You’re always concerned about where you’re supposed to fit in the equation. Why should I feel responsible or guilty about “neglecting” a child that already has a mother when I haven’t born any children of my own.
I think it’s so messy and irresponsible in the first place to have children out-of-wedlock, but to come back into the dating pool, without a full understanding that your situation is kind of effed up, and what you’re liable to put people are single and supposed to be carefree through is kind of selfish in itself. People are attracted to other people for a whole myriad of reasons, but to become then to trap them in a situation where now you have to get acquainted with and adjust to another (needy) individual is asking a lot. And then what happens if you’ve set there and readjusted your whole life for a ready-made family and it doesn’t pan out. Now you’re having to deal with feelings of loss and rejection from two (or in some cases more) people all walking away.
It’s just one big old mess, and that’s why single parents should do everybody a favor and just date each other. ANd do some Brady Bunch ish.
A woman once told me she’d never date a man with kids because then he’d never love her kids like he loves his own…a bit selfish, yes? When I pointed out that a guy could say the same thing she insisted that it was different. Kinda makes you wonder….