6 Incredibly Subtle Ways To Get Laid Without Asking
Photo by M. Schultz Model: Summer Walker & Mr. Kumputer
“Hmm, how do I say this? I guess the best way to say it, is to just come out with it. I wanna f*ck you.” Not very subtle right? Well I’m sure we’ve all developed code words or phrases so we won’t have to say “hey I want you to come over so I can stick the manxilla so deep inside you, your eyeballs will start to bulge out of your skull.” So, with a little bit of help from my twitter friends I’ve come up with some clever ways to let your lover know, hey I want some, without saying hey I want some.
“Let me check your scrotum?” The Fly Girl @TheOnlyTFG”
- I’ve actually had a woman say this to me before. She said “let me see it, make sure there are no extra bumps and bruises on it.” Then, while she was examining me like a piece of produce she put it in her mouth. So Fellas if you hear this prepared to be sucked. Hey! Her face is down there anyway right?
“You Wanna Come Over?” Young Safe @YoungSafe
- This is one of the most infamous terms ever. I’ve noticed a lot of times women like to play dumb when they hear this phrase uttered. I’ve invited numerous women over to my apt for the soul purpose of doing to nasty this way, only to be left with blue balls and all of my Kool-Aid drank up. SMCH! Well listen here… If I ask you to come over, 9 times out of 10 it means I want you to come over and have sex with me. Yes, even if it’s my first time inviting you over.
“Can You Massage My Back For Me Please? or You Wanna Massage” Tonda via Twitter
- When I hear a woman ask me for a massage I go from limp to rock in 2.3 seconds flat. We all know that a massage is the code word for sex. I’ve actually had women decline my massage offer because they knew it would lead to sex. Once a guy get down to the small of her back… He should just keep going lower and lower and next thing he know. He’ll be eating her from behind and swimming in her glory a few minutes later. FYI woman, learn how to massage and understand that if we request a massage its not really to help ease any tension, it mean rub on me until you ready to have sex with me. Just thought I should let you know.
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