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The Most Embarrassing Things Happen During Sex
Posted in Rated Grown Up, Sexual Intellectuals on 21. Apr, 2009
Before I had my website I used to blog on myspace and every so often a female would make me an offer I couldn’t refuse. Which ended up being my most embarrasing sexual moment ever!
Long story short this lovely thick girl who just so happened to live around the corner from me in Atlanta wanted to hook up with me. We conversed via messages, im and phone and one Sunday night we decided to go out. I took her to this little poetry spot in Atlanta. We had a great time. She had the nicest booty on the eastside of the A. After the night was over we got a bite to eat and headed back to my place. We started to kiss, next thing I had a handful of ass and a boob in my mouth. The manxilla was hard as a rock. I pretended to need a break, I walked into the back to get a rubber and when I got back we were at it again. I was about to sleep with one of my readers. I pulled her panties off and fingered her, her moans sounded like sweet music being played in a semi drunk state of mind. Then I reached in my pocket pulled out the condom opened it and realized I was only half hard.
I tried to roll it on anyway and it just wasn’t working. She was determined and she put her mouth to work, it was great head, but the manxilla still wouldn’t pay any attention. All I could think about was the legend of BlogXilla is now tarnished. She was sucking and sucking, and I can’t remember if I came or not, but if I did… she doesn’t know that I did, I may have ran to the bathroom with my nut in my hand… (Pause) Needless to say this was my most embarrassing sexual moment. I never attempted to make up for it either. We just couldn’t connect. I did go over her house late one night, and we were interrupted by her daughter waking up and her male friend popping up at her house. Maybe those were signs. Who knows.
I did ask some of my twitter/facebook friends what were their most embarrassing sexual moments and they have me topped by a lot. Trust me when I say this is some of the funniest stuff you’ll ever read.
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LOL! Been there. My man just kept going with the flow.
But ya'll got me rolling with these asthma attack stories. I used to have it so I can only imagine how serious it was. I do remember sometimes hyperventilating after sex though. I mean seriously, my man didn't know what happened. LOL! I guess the sex was just that damn good. : )
No boubt…I really thought that was very nice of him to come in the bathroom, get u undressed and bathe you….and change the sheets while you was in the bathroom…..
He would've got a lot of cool points with me for that one
OMG. I feel so bad for you. But I think your story is in my top 5. It was hilarious.
U threw up on him. OMG. Too funny. At least everything worked out in the end. WOW
He as unaware that he even had a blood clot on his brain, but like I said had he not been trying to keep up with my movement he probably would have not developed this condition. Hell I was with him for 11 years he is 64 now and I am 40 we have a nine year old son together.
That (most likely) wasn't urine hun. You squirted. A lot of women don't know they can do it until it happens!
Ok, here goes… I was pushing and throwing it towards heaven. It was soo good. But I must have lifted the wrong way bec somehow, air got inside of me. I felt it going in and knew whatever goes in has to come out. I was so terrified that he would think I was farting when the air came out that I unconsciously stopped moving. He lifted my legs and asked if I was alright but before I could answer, all the air came out of me. He was brutal in that he did not let the moment just ride, he stopped, pulled out, and looked at my stuff like “DAG”!!! I hate him!
You can stop that from happening by using the bathroom before and immediately after having sex. The friction of sex sometimes pushes bacteria into the urethra. If left there too long, it causes UTI's. Also, start taking cranberry tablets. They lower the ph of the vagina and keep bacteria from growing.
Ha ha yeah I did the vomit thing! I deep throated my man so good I vomited. But he liked it! LOL go figure… afterwards I made him clean it up and fix me something to eat cause I was hungry again! SMH
LMAO, this is sooo funny!!! xD
This was one of the most hilarious (if not THE most hilarious) posts i've ever read!!!
My God, kudos 2u! Lol
This post is friggin hi-la-ri-ous!!!! lmao. anyways i know im so late commenting but MY most embarassing sex moments was when one day i was getting fingered up my “other” pussy. i was sooooooo into it. i damn near broke his hand off with how i was fucking his finger. we both came to the conclusion that i like it better there than in other places. needless to say though, i ended up learning why it's important to clean out your pipes before you go up the other end. lmao. embarrassed does not even begin to describe how i felt after a couple small clumps fell out. i felt like crying. lol. he wasnt as bothered as i was though. we eventually got a good kick out of it after i calmed down.