From The Vault: Whisper In Her Ear
Photo by Will Springfield
Ladies I’m telling you, just add a link to one of my blogs on your facebook or myspace profile and you will discretely advise your man of how you want to be treated. Here is a a top 10 list of things to say to your wife/girl/special friend/f*ck buddy or whatever you call the person you’re sleeping with before, during and after sex.
It has come to my attention that not all dudes are vocal in the bedroom, or they either say some of the dumbest stuff, like my ex girl used to tickle my balls, let me blow in your ass, or worst “Is that a MOLE on your ass”?!?!
So to help the fellows out there I have came up w/ a list of 10 things you can and should say to your woman while she is ass out in her birthday suit looking like a biscuit smothered in gravy.
10. Hungry? Stay here and look pretty I’ll go make breakfast.
This works best if you had amazing sex that night… matter fact scratched that, it works best if you fucked the living shit out of her, i mean so hard that you to collapsed into unconsciousness. Then you woke up around 7am and had sex w/ her then right after you finished… ask her if she is hungry.
9. Let me get you a light.
It is a natural fact that the after sex cigarette is Ecstasy! As she lays on the bed place the cigarette in her mouth and light it. While she’s in between puffs give her a kiss on the cheek or the forehead. Inhale and exhale.
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