Ho No More

Posted in Relationships on Mar 18, 2009

Photo by Selector Marx fullscreen-capture-3182009-72324-ambmp

Photo by Selector Marx

Disclaimer: If you find yourself somewhere in the paragraphs below don’t be offended, just think objectively and respond with a well thought out statement, remember it’s a question.

Written by Cedric Shine for BlogXilla.com

Why is it, that women decide they don’t want to be a ho no more when you start dating them?

Never mind the lines of dudes who beat it up before. You know the ones who barely spit any g to get them out of their panties, those instances were merely situational.

But now that you’ve come on along, Mr. Right as they call you. Their soul mate, chics want to stop their whorish ways.

It baffles me, it baffles me! They walk into a room and can have easily have slept with three of the men in there but now that you’ve come along they want to take it slow, they’ve found a new them.

They’ve made mistakes and they understand that, but they need you to be man enough to not only accept that they’ve been not 1, not 2, hell not even 3 dudes jump offs but that you are supposed to wife it as well.

So I ask again, why is that women decide they don’t want to be a ho no more when you start dating them?

Is simp written on your forehead, mr. nice guy, Sir ‘you’re so different from the rest’!

No no no no no, is there a hoes convention that tells them who to bring this nonsense to. Oh I get it, if you’re young, educated, ambitious and have no kids you are the best thing to settle down with, after …. they’ve had their fun.

But you’re not so different from the rest. You just listen better than most, so when I ask why is it that women decide their gonna change their ways when you meet them, it’s because they couldn’t tell that you’re from the school of thought that a hoes gonna be a ho, a n—–’s gonna be a n—– (insert Mobb Deep song), no matter what they thought. Take ya hoe a-$ on!


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  • TRJ
    i have met a couple females like this. when i ask the same question to them (in better choice of words of course) i get answers like "you make me feel special". so i have came to the conclusion that it is us men who make them change their ways. i say this because if the tables are turned and i am the hoe its like i know when i want to just sleep with a female, that means no feelings are involved and everything we do together is only for me i dont care about her feelings and she dont make me feel anything other than when im cumming. however if i run into that one woman who makes me feel like "that nigga" and i aint even touch her yet then ima stop bullsh!tting. another reason is b/c when you have sex for the first couple times you will have some type of feelings for them people but once you make sex a habit it will not have a intimate sensation anymore but when you find that person who gives you that intimate sensation w/o any sex you will have a change of heart
  • yes
    exactly
  • don
    Theres nothing in here about a woman who has a jump off or has a respectable amount of partners this brother is clearly talking about a HO someone who cant go anywhere without running into someone she done laid down with, someone who bones for money etc. Now as far as that double standard just suck it up women just like its not cool for a man to hit a woman its not cool for a woman to have every man she ever meets it just is what it is
  • HeadMistress
    @ "Theres nothing in here about a woman who has a jump off or has a respectable amount of partners this brother is clearly talking about a HO"

    Exactly!

    But although these are obviously not the type of women described in the post, they are great comments and I think the best we can hope for - if left up to "True Hoes" to stand up and be heard...the comment box would be full of tumbleweeds and cricket chirps...LOL
  • I love this blog & this entry especially. Not speaking for any woman but myself & my views but I personally believe it's not a radar of Mr. Right that turns a hoe switch on nor off. It's been a constant contradiction forever & ages to come on woman having to be composed & ladylike while men can chase & beat any amount/shape/form/size of woman they'd like. So maybe it's more of a man taking that woman's actions out of context. I'm sure.. -scratch that.. I'm POSITIVE there's been MANY instances where a man has walked in a club with a new main squeeze/wifey under the wing & he feels the tension from all the other females he's done a hit & run on. To my knowledge we all have hormones, no? None greater than the other (male/female) So who's to say on some nights my hand doesn't want to get to work, my back rather be blown out, sometimes we want to keep JackRabbit in his cage & get a man to please us. Not looking for a commitment at the time or it's something convenient & casual..it works. So when I've finally found a counter partner who I feel can enlighten me mentally, spiritually, emotionally & physically, I have to apologize for my sex life? Just accept & respect it. As a REAL woman should w/ her new boo as well. You can genuinely see when someone is forreal & if the vibe is right, if you know that ladyfriend is STILL trickin'.. you're the only one to blame. But if it's classic, lose a chance at love over casual sex BEFORE you?! Weigh it on a scale.


    Just my thoughts xoxo
  • TRJ
    but the thing about that is when the opposite sex tells you about their "adventurous" sex life it makes you wonder if this relationship yall are about to try going to fall down because either this is how she gets it in or whats going to happen when she see the next fly young dude? if a girl or a dude had sex wit A, B, and C when he or she gets to D what do you think they are going to do better yet how would you feel if you are D. nevertheless if the feelings are true between the two people then just as you said the past sex life would have to be accepted. i guess its all about both parties and their feelings.
  • don
    Ima have to say that I have had this happen to me numerous times only cuz they mistake me for something im not a super simp. Man you know a ho when you see one and they really belive that you are gonna put on your cape and take them and there 3 kids from 3 differnt dads away from all this ( im not jokin i just finished talking to a broad like this who really was saying i was gonna be her husband)
  • Yep you sure do, a hoe can be spotted a mile away... or not even a hoe just a loose chick... GOT EM!!!
  • This happens to me way too much. They want to settle down with me after they already had their fun. I have to stop being so damn nice.
  • Yeah man I feel you, happens to me too. I think it's just the in thing for women to say... because i hear it all too often...
  • TRJ
    but you only got one life why not have fun before its too late and you married with 2 kids. i know for me all the sex im having right now is just so if and when i get married my wife could have the best stress reliever, so why she it be different for a woman to do the same?
  • mizznasty
    i couldnt agree more with bombshell! The double standard is still alive and in full effect....however, if you are referring to the ho that has 4 kids, 3 baby daddies, doesnt work because she tricks to get by and cant even count how many partners she has had, and everyone in your circle can say they have all had a taste then yeah i feel you. SHe need not apply to the husband material candidate. But for the female that is ambitious and self confident, knows what she wants when she wants and how she wants it then i disagree. Perhaps she had a jumpoff or 2 yet consistent but she feels a connection to you and wants to try to get serious...

    and i pose this question: if a female wants a jumpoff whats wrong with that? Eff all these pseudo relationships when in actuality they are just a consistent humping partner that u can chill with. Whats up wit people slapping labels just so they wont be considered a ho?
  • i want to pose this question for women though... how much is too many when it comes to jumpoffs?
  • HeadMistress
    I don't think there is a magic number - it's the circumstances surrounding the number

    It's just like any siutation in life, you know when you've gone to fast, gone too far, had too much & had too many
  • HeadMistress
    Actually I take that last part back...

    You know it BEFORE you've gone to fast, gone too far, had too much & had too many
  • BlogXilla
    yeah I agree with you aint no magic number it's just the fact that a woman could have 100 partners and not be a whore and another one could have 20 and be a giant whoreslut!! it all depends on the circumstances.
  • TheLovelyMsRedz
    If he's your soulmate, why WOULD you act ho-ish with him?

    Most women know that a man will not take you seriously if you jump into bed with him on the first night. So, if she sees potential in you, she'll play the good-girl role and try to get to know you before sleeping with you.

    Now, if she's a known ho that's slept with several dudes in the neighborhood and everyone knows it, then she needs to just find someone from the other side of town who doesn't know about her ex-ho past to wife her up.
  • I don't think it's about acting ho-ish I think it's more men wanting sex... and a man most likely isn't going to wife someone who's been around the block in the first place... but that doesn't mean we will treat them like shit either. We will still be nice to them still take them out and hell we might even get them a thing or two... we just want to have sex and i'll wait for a good women, but i'll be damn if i wait for a hoe.. makes no sense.
  • tosweetheart
    It's pretty simple actually. It's because despite the fact that it's 2009 most men still do NOT want to marry a woman that has been with more men than them, and also does NOT want to marry any woman their perceive to be "giving it up to easily". It's the classic double standard. Most men (i.e. all) are not generally going to want to marry someone that gives it up on the first night.

    So... woman act as liberated and sexually open "I wanna get my freak on/I know this isn't going anywhere" with the kind of man that they know they would never be serious about. Because they are not as concerned with the perception/reprecussions.

    If the woman thinks she might want to get serious (i.e.she's met "Mr. Right") and wants to be taken seriously by the man... she makes him (and herself) follow the "society driven rules" for taking it slow, and not jumping into bed. Often this is not because she does not want to have sex, but more because she wants his perception of her to be more pure (i.e. someone her could marry cuz she doesn't hop into bed on the first night).

    Sorry men but you can't have it both ways... If you're honest with yourself you will admit you aint' tryin' to wife no woman that sexed you on the first night!!! And that's precisely why women do it!
  • Maybe it's just me but i don't want an amateur I want a woman whose been around the block a few times...
  • interesting topic. i think a woman has a right to decide who she wants to be a jumpoff for and who she doesn't. if it ain't you, you have a choice to bounce and keep it moving or stick by her. she ain't holding a gun to your head.

    like bombshell said, it happens when the roles are reversed all the time. i know sometimes when i go out with her, there may be women out there that throw shades or dirty looks. just chalk it up to the game and keep it pushing. lol.
  • OooLaLa
    "Why is it, that women decide they don’t want to be a ho no more when you start dating them?"

    Because if you're "dating" someone, you treat them differently than how you would treat a jump off. If we're doing the normal "dating" stuff", now why would the woman start acting all ho-ish?

    Besides, just because a woman has a past doesn't mean she's a "ho" . Like many have already stated, when a woman meets someone she feels she has a connection with, she wants it to last, so she'll take it slow. Because we all know what happens when a woman gives it up at the first hello.
  • Jane D
    hmmm, that's very interesting......i'm a bit confused with this tho....i think it's because of the double standard that was mentioned above by tosweetheart and bombshell, I'm from the school of thought that being a ho is not physical but is actually a state of mind, number of partners or easiness of giving it away are not indicators of a hoe, my intentions and the way I carry myself makes or breaks me in that aspect. Maybe when a woman meets a man who they percieve is "mr right", perhaps she feels the need to take it slow because she actually deems you worthy enough to build something that isn't based on physicality? Perhaps it should be seen as a compliment that she wants to be on her best behavior for you, so to speak. I believe that sex too early can mess up a thing you want to hang on to for a minute, now a jumpoff is a jumpoff and if you want to get it poppin like that, them i'm gonna treat you exactly what you act like.....while i still keep that eye out for mr right...LOL I'm young so I'm still navigating this terrain, but I love the blog it really makes me think
  • what?
    If you just want to fuck the HO then why would dude "date" her? I think dude is sending this HO the wrong message...let the HO know that it is what it is...eventhough u are a "nice guy, good catch and what not" Sheesh its not that difficult
  • hazysin
    HMM....I DONT KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN WITH THIS ONE........CAN I STAND UP AND SAY I WAS ONCE A "TRUE HOE"........GOOD GUYS ALWAYS TRIED TO LOCK IT DOWN BUT I ALWAYS HAD MY EYES SET ON A BIGGER FISH, SOMEONE WITH MORE. IRONICALLY WHEN I DECIDED THAT I NEEDED MORE ALL THOSE GUYS THAT WERE LINING UP WHEN I WAS "RENTING IT" WERE NOWHERE TO BE FOUND. MOST OF MY MALE FRIENDS ALWAYS CALLED ME THEIR "HOMEBOY" BECAUSE IF I WERE A MALE, I WOULD BE ALPHA...PLAIN AND SIMPLE I REJECTED THE ROLE SOCIETY PLACED ON ME AS A FEMALE.

    BUT THAT WAS WHEN I WAS YOUNGER...THE PROBLEM COMES IN HONESTLY...I MEET A NICE GUY AND I WANT HIM TO KNOW EVERYTHING SO THAT THERE ARE NO SECRETS BUT HOW CAN YOU SAY..."WE MIGHT BE IN THE MALL AND SEE SOMEONE IVE FUCKED, BUT THAT'S THE PAST BECAUSE ITS ALL ABOUT YOU NOW?"

    THE MENTALITY OF THE EXTREMELY SEXUALLY ACTIVE FEMALE IS SOMETHING OF A CONUNDRUM BECAUSE FOR THE MOST PART-- SEX IS THE EMOTIONAL PART IN THE SITUATION. NOT UNTIL THEY HAVE REALIZED HOW THEIR PROMISCUITY HAS BEEN TO THEIR DISADVANTAGE (MULTIPLE CHILDREN, MULTIPLE DISEASES OR A HORRIBLE REPUTATION) DO THEY ATTEMPT TO REWORK THEIR IMAGE.

    IVE HAD MY SHARE OF SUCKERS TOO--ALL DAY SUCKERS....THE ONCE WHO MET ME IN THE STRIP CLUB OR SOME OTHER ARKWARD PLACE AND THEY EXPECT ME TO CHANGE SIMPLY BECAUSE OF THEM, SPEND HIS MONEY AND TIME, EVEN ADMIT TO "CHANGE" (USUALLY JUST DOING DIRT ON THE LOW) AND WHEN HE ASK WHY THE RESPONSE IS ALWAYS THE SAME...."ITS ALL FOR YOU , BOO". HE LAMES ARE SIMPS BECAUSE THEY THINK ITS SIMPLY FOR THEM
  • Jane D
    nice........."if i were a male I would be alpha, i rejected the role society placed on me AS A FEMALE" female sexuality, especially in this society is a connundrum indeed my friend
  • don
    @ hazysin U might have hit the nail on the head why would a man want to date a woman that thinks like a guy? Would you want to date a dude who acts like a broad and that is another problem with dating hoes the have AAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLot of experince not just with men but with manipulating men and eventually that mentallity will resurface and they will try you as well. I dont hear about any true to the game hoes just hanging it up. All they do is square up get a simp and use him up str8 up.
  • Jane D
    Wow.....so a woman can't change......a woman can't make a concious decision to revamp her sexuality? People have pliable mentalities and factors like nurture, nature, and ego shape them....what exactly is masuclinity and femininity? A girl who thinks like a guy is one smart cookie in my opinion because her reason figures into her logic, just as much if not more than her emotion making for a potent and powerfully receptive intellect. A man who acts like a woman could be a man who is in touch with his emotions to the point that he can make choices that are not merely regulated to his loins or machismo, we are both yin and yang, masculine and feminine, and if a man can be manipulated by a woman then it's his own fault, wouldn't that qualify as don't hate the player, hate the game?
  • hazysin
    TO A CERTAIN EXTENT........IVE NEVER PRIDED MYSELF ON MANIPULATING MEN, IN FACT I KEEP IT 100%. SEX EXCHANGED FOR MONEY IS NOTHING MORE THEN A TRANSACTION THATS WHY YOU KEEP IT SAFE AND KEEP IT MOVING.

    "YOU CANT TURN A HOE INTO A HOUSEWIFE"...I USED TO DISAGREE WITH THIS SOO MUCH UNTIL IN ONE LARGE SMOKING SESSIONS, MY MALE FRIEND GAVE ME THEIR REASONING.....BECAUSE HER MENTALITY NEVER CHANGES......SHE WILL ALWAYS REVERT BACK TO HER SELFISH, GREEDY, CONNIVING ACTIONS.......I TRUTHFULLY AGREE.

    SOMETIMES WHEN IM ANGRY WITH MY GUY.....WHO HAS BEEN MY FRIEND SINCE I WAS LIKE 17,AND WATCH THE TRANSFORMATION.....FROM GOOD GIRL GONE BAD TO GROWN ASS WOMAN WITH A PAST.....I THINK ABOUT GOING BACK TO DOING ME ONLY BECAUSE IT SEEMS EASIER BUT THEN I REMEMBER THAT THIS ISNT ONE OF THE MILLIONS OF LAMES THAT CHOSE ME, I CHOSE HIM....
  • Jane D
    call me what you want but I think that REAL LOVE can transform anybody, with any type of past, when you find someone who truthfully loves and cares for you, and you open yourself to recieving that love, the transformation can't be stopped, now of course it will take time, but I like to believe a ho can be a housewife, if you give her a good reason to be, love is painful and maybe that's why the ho does what she does in the first place, getting the benefits of a relationship with none of the emotional baggage, like you said it's a transformation; before the bad girl there was always a good girl
  • hazysin
    Exactly everytime i think about going back, i remind myself about how much he loves ME and all my flaws. Man, relationships a hard but i think that the amount of energy put into reflects by the amount of happiness you receive from it.

    I live without regret but like Jay-Z said, "once a good girls gone bad, she's gone forever"
  • Jane D
    I feel u on that sis......I believe that too with all my heart but I see it as more of a mentality thing, like once a good girl realizes that this world ain't all good especially when it comes to men and her sex, the rose colored glasses are gone and she looks at the world differently, views relationships differently....big up to u n ur boo tho, that's a beautiful thing somebody who's got you flaws and all
  • hazysin
    PRECISELY.........WE ARE TOLD THAT WE SHOULD STAY CHASTE, GET MARRIED, BEAR THE FRUIT OF HIS LOINS AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER. ONCE WE REALIZE THAT ITS ONLY A FAIRYTALE AND THAT OUR PRINCE CHARMING IS REALLY A JERK, WE REVOLT. WE REBEL AGAIN ALL SOCIETAL ROLES IN HOPES OF FINDING ONE THAT FITS US UNIQUELY.

    GIRL I LOVE IT....IM JUST GLAD I DIDNT GET CAUGHT UP WITH A SPORT TEAM WORTH OF CHILDREN BEFORE WE HAD A CHANCE AT THIS.....YOU KNOW BEING A HOE AND ALL :)
  • This article comes right on schedule. I was reading aubrey's blog on global grind and reading people amp her up and say that she's just being herself and "free" the other day and convieniently enough katie blogs about shouting out the "good girls" in the world and I commented on Katies blog saying that women who carry themselves like whore's should not expect to be treated with respect once they decide to be righteous again. This article taps right into what I was trying to say. They parade around like whores and their excuse for it is that they're "young".

    Then when their "young" asses want to grow up they expect for their whorish ways to be forgotten? It just makes no sense. However, I do believe people can see the error in their ways and make the decision to change; but expecting people to put it on the backburner as they do and to make a permanent mental note that now they want to behave, is perplexing and not realistic.
  • RIGHT. you hit the nail on the head. couldn't have put it any better. you can't just put that out of your mind. it's burned permenantly into your mind... then you have the whole town laughing at YOU when your out in public cause you wifed up ho...smh.
  • hazysin
    SO IS THE REAL ISSUE THE IMAGE?
  • DC_REALEST
    pimps up...hoes down
  • Isis
    LMFAO. . . .My cousin wifed a hoe. Which confused the hell outta me (and the rest of our cousins). Everybody seemed to know she was a hoe but him (about half our males cousins and maybe two uncles hit her), its like when she got with him she wanted to talk about god and the direction of her life. .lol. And he wont believe this chick is a full-blow-card carrying-union due paying hoe. . .lol. keep trying to tell him old habits die hard, and hers never took a nap
  • hazysin
    LMFAO @ ISIS...NEVER TOOK A NAP HUH?
  • What is the definiton of Ho...or Whore....

    It's definitely NOT someone who give it up on the first night and I'll tell u why. If a guy and girl have been talking over the phone and or via email for a few months and they go on their first date and they have sex that 1st night, it doesn't mean she's a HO. She couldn've been on a 2yr hiatus or maybe she just got out of a 6yr relationship and needed to release some tension.

    One of my guy friends told me that he met this girl and she was holding out on him for months! They went out...chilled and did everything that constitutes dating and he never got to hit it. One day, one of his boys asked...him if he was dating the chick he brought around and he said yeah why...and he said..."b/c she done f*ck every dude within a 20 block radius including his friend he was talking to. And she f*cked all his friends. He confronted her about it and said she didn't let him hit b/c "he was the one" but he didn't want to hear that sh*t after she was suckin and f*ckin one of his boys just the day b4.

    I say all of that to say that you can't call someone a ho based on their actions sometimes.

    At the end of the day....ho's need love too I guess. She can't be a ho for the rest of her life b/c her body will change especially after all the sexin she did in her life span lol.
  • Jane D
    yes! co-sign mama, hoes need love too!
  • hazysin
    HOES DO NEED LOVE TOO!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Isis
    I understand ho's needing love too, but if the said "ho" would have loved herself would she have ever gotten the title of being a ho ????
  • I think the reason why she didn't let him hit is because she wasn't feeling him "ho's" are pretty smart and when I say smart I'm not speaking in terms of intelligence. For example, I know this guy that is "dating" this girl. He hardly gets any from her but his dumb ass pays her bills and pays for her cellphone. Every other week she's telling him that she doesn't want to be in a relationship because she has "friends". Turns out these "friends" have been getting quite friendly with her in ways he doesn't.

    A ho may sleep around with numerous somebodies but she doesn't give it up to everyone she has the one's she f*cks and the one's she uses to fix things around the house and pay her bills. As for the label "ho" I think talking to someone and sleeping with them on the same night may not make you a ho unless you do that everynight with different men. We as women need to seriously understand our worth and know that it is priceless. How do you expect others to respect when respect doesn't start from within?
  • I wouldn't say "WE" as women need to understand our worth and know it's priceless b/c I think that I know my worth, I respect it and I understand that once I give of "myself" I can't get it back.

    It's the Ho's, Whores and Sluts that need to understand that.

    :)
  • I don't like to judge ppl...if a female is a ho, whore or slut then it is what it is. I tend to think about why ppl are the way that they are.

    What happened to her for her to be the way that she is? Was she molested as a child? Was she raped? Was she looking for 'love' in all the wrong places b/c of an absentee father? Did she learn this behavior from her mother who was having different men in the house? There's are reason why ho's are ho's.

    But that doesn't take away from the fact that they need love too. Eventually, maybe they'll find good or something will happen to make them appreiate their worth and they'll turn over a new leaf and find a man that will help pull them through whatever it was that lead them astray.
  • HeadMistress
    Bravo Ness...needless to say I approve this message :-)

    My concern (not really but for lack of a better expression) are those that claim they are like that because they feel they are rebelling against some double standard or society's labels...

    There is a double standard but as far as I'm concerned it can stay forever because I have no desire to be like any man that sleeps around with random chicks...better yet that man is just as undesireable to a decent woman as a ho is to a decent man

    I do believe people can change, trick is it has to be because they want to better themselves and not just to attract or impress someone else - when the change is made for the wrong reason chances are the person will revert to their old behavior at the first sign of disappointment
  • I am Ness and I agree and approve this message! :)

    And I agree with " I have no desire to be like any man that sleeps around with random chicks...better yet that man is just as undesireable to a decent woman as a ho is to a decent man"

    But like u said. Change has to come from within & it has to be done for the right reasons 4 it to be effective.
  • hazysin
    @ headmistress...There is a double standard but as far as I'm concerned it can stay forever because I have no desire to be like any man that sleeps around with random chicks..

    That is a statement of personal opinion just as me saying i was rejecting a societal role. For you to agree that a double standard does exist but then say what YOU dont have the desire to be sound judgmental to me.

    Being the only female with 10 brothers (including a twin) exposed me to that same double standard on a constant and daily basis until i was at a point where i could assert myself......

    Oh but i can completely agree with you about the change thing though
  • HeadMistress
    @ "That is a statement of personal opinion just as me saying i was rejecting a societal role."

    Yeah, I am a person and that is my opinion... :-D

    @ " For you to agree that a double standard does exist but then say what YOU dont have the desire to be sound judgmental to me."

    Being judgmental within reason is not a bad thing.

    Based on my upbringing, being a ho is not respectable or appealing (in a man or a woman) to me and I choose not to be that and YES, that is a form of judgment...its called personal judgment

    Am I on a crusade to persecute those that choose to be hoes...NO, hence, my personal judgment is "within reason" as it only affects me and how I live my life

    Every woman alive has faced some form of double standard, I'm sure most have chosen one DS or another to challenge and assert ourselves against...again personal choice and judgment dictates which DS we choose to conquer...
  • Isis
    I don't judge to each its own . . .but I what if she wasn't molested, what if she had a loving father in the home, her mother was never that way.
    What if she do what she does for the hell of it. . . I know a chick who does, calls herself a hoe then gets ma when the rest of the world does it
  • Then there was something that made her be that way. Maybe her parents were there for her, but she decided to break free from their chains and their over protecting ways and she became the ultimate slut bunny.

    I don't believe that ppl wake up and say...the sun is out, the birds are chirping, I think today is the perfect day for me to start my journey on becoming a ho". Something had to trigger something. Whether she got treated bad by some ain't sh*t dudes, or she just wants to get money and not have to work....it has to start from something.

    As 4 ur friend...she's an umpalumpa. How can she get mad b/c someone is calling her what she is especially if she agrees that she's ho....lol... (singing ludacris's......u a hoooooooooo...ho...u a hoooooo....hooo ....u a hoooo...hooo...I said that u a hooo) lol...that's wht u should tell her to reference lol.
  • Isis
    LMFAO. . . .She is not my friend shes a chick that latched on to me in high school and like a bad memory I can't shake her ass
  • Oh okay....lol....
  • I don't think it's about being a ho that's not the problem the problem is why you wanna stop being a ho!! We got with her because she was a ho...

    and yes most women who are looose were molested or raped or just had a terrible relationship with their fathers... or they get it from they momma...

    it runs in the blood.
  • Maybe the men who try to get with ho's aren't cut out to be with ho's.

    It takes a certain type of man I guess.....

    Maybe ya'll r in the "nice guys finish last group" therefore the ho's recognize the 'good' in ya'll and decide to fall back on her ho-ish tendancies. Maybe u should start to portray a "ain't sh*t" nucca attitude then she'll continue her ho'ish ways and u'll get the skin s*cked off ur d*ck and she'll do spins and flips on it until u need a 5hr energy drink. :) lol

    lol.
  • Isis
    Xilla I have a ? if a woman was a ho but decides to become reformed because she does feel the man (or one of) is the one and she changes her ways can will he respect her for it or if she's upfront about her past and the fact that shes trying to change her life ???
  • don
    @ Isis unfortanly the answer is nope its the equiv. of your dude telling you he was gay and not only gay a gay man ho. Yea you think you can deal with it but number 1 its always gonna be in your mind and 2: you are always gonna worry he is gonna go back to his old ways. Thats the way most dudes view hoes
  • hazysin
    @ DON. STOP. YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT...BEEN THERE SEVERAL TIMES BUT IN THE LONG RUN IF A PERSON TRULY LOVES YOU THEY WONT "LISTEN TO THE VOICES"...(THATS WHAT MY BOYFRIEND CALLS THE DOUBT/MISTRUST HE SOMETIMES EXPERIENCES)
  • don
    @ Hazysin co-sign the only problem with them voices they might be telling you the right thing to do. I have ignored them in the past only to get bit all in the ass later.
  • hazysin
    OH....I DIDNT THINK ABOUT THAT
  • don
    hazysin but all in all i will say i do respect your honesty and the fact you didnt try to put up all kinda fronts on why you did what you did so keep it playa
  • hazysin
    HONESTY IS THE KEY TO ANY RELATIONSHIP....PLUS I DONT HAVE A LIFETIME TO HIDE FROM MY PAST. WITH A MOUTHPIECE LIKE MINES, I WILL NEVER BE LONELY


    LOOK AT IT LIKE THIS, "PRACTICE MAKE PERFECT" : )
  • Blacksand
    There is one true constant in life. That is change. Ho's do need Love. We all do. I don't agree with the statement once a ho always a ho. That's like saying once you're fat you will always be fat. That is not true. Or once a crack head, you will always be a crack head. That is false as well. It all depends on the internal drive and commitment a person is willing to put towards that change.

    Love is a powerful thing. Once a woman has a mans heart he will love her whether she was a ho or not. For unconditional Love a man will put aside all that he has to be with that woman. That is the truth. He will let go of his ego. He will not worry about his image. For real Love, a man will make himself vulnerable to his woman. He will accept her in her entirety, faults and whatever baggage comes along with her.

    And if it doesn't work he is a better man for having had the opportunity to have experienced true Love and lost than to never have had true Love at all. I'm out...
  • hazysin
    YEAH....IVE GOT ONE OF THOSE GUYS...AT FIRST WHEN WE WERE CREEPING, IT WAS COOL BUT THEN WHEN EMOTIONS GOT INVOLVED HE ULTIMATELY HAD TO DECIDE WHICH WAS MORE IMPORTANT ME OR HIS "IMAGE"
  • Blacksand
    Good for you, that's what's up! Image vs Love. That is an easy one. I wish you both all the happiness two people can possibly experience together. May your journey be a peaceful one hazysin.
  • Isis
    just trying to understand the dynamics of it all
  • @ isis i gotta disagree with ty. and agree that communication is key. yu really dont know how many people's mothers, and great wives that you amy look up to was smuts back in the day. especially with all that free love in the 60's. that wasn't just white folks, it was black folks too.

    now with that said. you have to know who you're dealing with and offer more to the equation. like real talk get cerebal with it. why were u a ho. were u the type who just loved tasting the football teams cum, cus I mean that's the pill no one is trying to swallow.

    but its all relative. how many is too many, which is another post that was written. some women say 10 is too many. you better believe alot of women have over 10 partners and they are married, in love and great wives. some dudes might say she was a ho. others might say its poor judgment.

    but the communication is needed, it makes u understand the person and the situations rather than just the acts
  • Isis
    I'm just trying to understand. My goddaughters mother is like that its confusing yet sad. After spending so much time "ho hopping" (her term not mine) she is trying to settle down but her past follows her. No matter how hard she tries to change she was what she was and when i asked her she had no logical reason or any reason at all for why she did what she did. All she says is I did it. her name rings bells around the city and some of the dudes have never seen her face just know her name and story.

    You can't cummunicate with a person who doesnt know why they did what they did.
  • I think it's more or less that We have to wait, it's possible to build a relationship with sex in a timely fashion... I think women put a time frame on when to give it up. You can go along and do what you do and still not sleep around... This whole spiritual vow of celibacy and other things is crazy. Plus men are selfish and stingy... so we want what we want when we want it...

    at the end of the day as long as the women is being true to her self it's not an issue.
  • Tye
    Dudes are Ho's too! So if they want some women to hubby them up after they screwed over 30 women......then why can't a women ask for the same thing they want? The same dudes that she see in the club that she sexed he done sexed plenty of women also! But, he wants someone that is fresh and new....well not going to happen! Even the youngins are out here humping like crazy!
  • don
    @ Tye a woman can ask for that but women dont hold that agianst a dude alot of women actually become more curious if a dude is desired and has layed a bunch of broads because it actually take some type of skill for a dude to get a bunch of chicks. It takes no skill for a women to have sex with a bunch of dudes.
  • Ludacris says it best...

    Cant turn a ho into a housewife
    Hos dont act right
    Theres hos on a mission, an hoes on a crackpipe
    Hey ho how ya doin, where ya been?
    Prolly doin ho stuff cuz there you ho again
    Its a ho wide world, that we livin in
    feline, feminine, fantastical, women
    Not all, just some
    You ho who you are
    Theres hoes in tha room, theres hoes in tha car
    theres hoes on stage, theres hoes by tha bar
    hos by near, an hos by far
    Ho! (But can i getta ride?!)
    NO! (Cmon, nigga why?!)
    Cuz youz a HO!!!
  • Lady Jei
    You know what is so ironic about this. I have become the opposite. Now that I have found someone, I have become a stone cold freak. I got the Kama Sutra in the drawer by the bed, and once a week we must perfect a position. We got the video camera right by the bed. (I got the remote).
    He is like, looking at me just walking down the street I won't so much as go near a penis. But behind closed doors, I become Vanessa Del Rio reincarnate.
    He told me when we first met his fellas thought "she look like the 'don't mess my hair up, and get that thang away from me'" type. When it has become the complete opposite.

    Be careful what you wish for.....lmao!!!
  • FIRST OF ALL (yes i needed to caps it) you shouldn't be DATING a jumpoff in the first place, well at least not knowingly.

    I too hate when chicks try to get brand new when they link up with a dude outside the circle she was just being passed around in. Most times the dude already knows you're a jump so its all the more stressful that shes tryna act like a virgin when you get the one-on-one
  • yes
    at the end of the day everybody just wants to be loved
  • lmao. If this entry isnt the truth, I don't know what is. Although, I'm never the "right guy"......I'm the dude that beat it up before u got to her......thankfully.
  • Sexy N Sassy
    I dont know why these hoes do that. I mean like they have alot of nerve to even go there. Usually hoes only get recognize for being hoes. Thats something you could never live down, in my book. So I dont see why, when they get with a particular man they get this way. But no matter how much they try to change,they will always have hoe tendacies. Thats why you cant make a hoe into a house wife.
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