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I Wasn’t Thinking Lifetime Bond, I Thought Nice Booty
Posted in Relationships on 19. Feb, 2009
It’s been said that “A woman should perform the duties of a wife without any complaints, give birth to good children and bring them up as ideal citizens.” In the very next breath, writer Robert Nathan believed that “A man’s family sets him apart from all other living creatures. Only man stands with his children from first to last, from birth to death, and to the grave.” I think there are very few real men and women in this world. Maybe that is why when a woman tinkle’s on that plastic stick, her mind goes through hell, and a man rarely thinks life time bond, as he give her the $250 to handle her business.
Right now I am breathing a sigh of relief, because the late night store run to a closed store in Brooklyn, did not turn into a lifetime bond of my own. I do not know what was on my mind at the time, that made me slide in between her legs with only my flesh, but now that we do not speak anymore… I cannot bring myself actually to ask a woman to get an abortion. Other men have no problem throwing the money in her face to make the hardest decision a woman would ever have to make during her life on Earth.
Most people do not give an explanation when they want someone to do something or just in general so I’ve compiled a list of reasons why men and women decide to go forward with an abortion.
OMG THIS MADE ME TEAR UP A LITTLE BIT.
No criticisms on this one. You hit all good points. Sadly, some ppl in our community shame others and that's why a lot of children make it into this world. Shewwww, probably me included. I've only jumped w/o a raincoat w/ 1person and could have easily had to make a decision that would have affected my life and his. Thank sweet baby Jesus nothing happened, but it does make you think and evaluate your choices in your mate/sexpartner and yourself. Such is life
Some people find abortion as their number one option because who wants to pop pills on a daily or put a condom on when things are going oh so good.? Basically people don't want to be responsible. Mistakes happen. The majority of pregnancies are an “oops” but what I think is really pathetic is people that use abortion as birth control.
People that had/have abortions got caught u or the timing just isn't right. Maybe they don't feel like they can be a good parent. Some people think they're too young and some just don't want to be a baby's momma/daddy so the decesion is made. But after the abortion is performed they have to live with that decision. That decision will haunt those with a conscious for the rest of their life. So the bottom line is if you are just hooking up with someone just to be hooking up, if you are getting your hustle on and you're not ready for kids, you have three options; Don't have sex, make sure you're both using protection, or do yourself their are plenty of great toys out there (so I hear, lol).
If you were raped that's a totally different story. I really feel for those that have to even think about having an abortion though that can't be easy. The good thing is that in life we all have choices. Our choices will either put us in this predicament from the jump or have some watching strollers or kids playing wondering what if you decided not to have that abortion.
Xilla, sometimes the man won't even hand over $250. One of my good friends got pregnant with a guy who she thought she was in love with, she was going to have twins, and they talked about aborting and everything. Lo and behold, it all came out of her own check. I felt so bad.
One big reason you forgot, and this was their “reason” too, is being too young. Things like money, selfishness, and bad parenthood dont even cross their minds at 17, 18, 19 years old.
No matter what, and i don't mean to offend, i could never abort. Not only do i not want my uterus to serve as a grave, but I COULD HAVE BEEN AN ABORTION.
when i think about it like that, i could never do it.
oh i know the too young thing, i just ain't add it because most of my readers are adults and it was a bit lengthy lol. But you're 100% right. Age is a big factor my niece just had a baby and she's young. But eh!! I hate abortion but I fully stand by a woman who has one. It's her choice and my opinion doesn't really matter when it comes to her life.
iola, did you hear Bristol Palin's interview? Not having sex isn't really realistic in this day and age. I fully understand your view on people being responsible but at the same time a person can't really help the decesion making in the heat of the moment. No one is perfect you know.
Here is a tissue
such is life… I'm glad things worked out for both you and I lol
I know two females that are under 21 with three children each. They had them back to back to back. Their parents knew of each pregnancy and while they were not happy, they were in favor of both young ladies having the children because “they didn't believe in abortion”. These parents lived check to check to support their children, pay rent, misc. bills. They also had a juvenile son who was 16 and not attending school regularly, a 8 year old who was disruptive in class, and a 20 year old who they did not support at all but was the only one really trying to make a change for the better. The mother drinks hard daily working a part-time job as a cafeteria worker for a retirement home, the father a maintenance man at their apt. complex making just enough to keep afloat. Their respective families were used to being generationally destitute financially, and clearly weren't the ethical or moral types; as I witnessed shameful behavior everday from fist-fights with neighbors, to public drunkenness to clear neglect for their children. With all of these situations going on in the household because they felt so strongly about abortion they would allow their daughter to use more resources they didn't have because they opposed abortion. I know I'm a man but to me that makes no sense financially or logically. Now emotionally some may differ but I personally feel you shouldn 't bring any children into this world if you cannot efficiently provide emotionally, physically, and spiritually the foundation that your children need that are ALREADY HERE. Just my two cents.
you're 100% right people bring children into this work under some f'd up circumstances and they do it selfishly rather than logically… they don't believe in abortion because of religious reasons but their having sex… makes no damn sense to me.
I won't and can't judge any woman who chooses to have an abortion. Having a child tends to effect the woman much more and earlier than it affects the man. Even if teh woman is in a committed relationship with teh child's father she still has to consider whether she is able to care for the child alone should the father decide he does not want to be around any longer.
I never thought i'd end up a single mother after being with a man for 7 years but here I am. It is the greatest thing in the world but it is also the hardest thing in the world, finding energy to play when you just want to sleep, mustering a smile when you just want to cry. You look at your child and want nothing but the best for them but you are already at a disadvantage.
I love my son to death and wouldn't change that for anything but i most definitely can't blame another woman for choosing not to live the life that I am living.
I know the feeling… Trust me I do. It's hard but it can be done. my mother did it.
Yeah it is hard as hell and it's worth it. I's quite able to do it but i have friends that aren't and I can see why they've made thier decision.
Me too
The don't have sex seems like an innocent but not realistic suggestion, but getting caught up in that heat of the moment can lead to not only a baby, but all the STD's that our community seems to be infamous for.
When did I say everyone should be perfect? Ain't no such thing it's just that if you gon lay down be prepared for the repercussions if any.
wow very deep, my wife just had an abortion and not sure if i can recoup from that becuase to me it is just like kiling one of our children that are walking around saying mommy this or daddy that, life is truly blessing, and i was devastated.
Yea they did
something i learned is that mistakes only happen when you are not paying attention to what you are doing. honest and truly sex before marriage causes the most mistakes with the greatest risk, i.e. AIDS and kids. even though it is a person's choice to have an abortion, that does make it right. if you dont want a child then after birth give the child up for adoption, same thing as abortion but you are not killing the child.
First : I love this blog…. I read it all the time
Even thought abortions and “morning after pills are always available they can really damage a womans body especially if their over used. I just think ppl have to be more responsible. I hear ppl all the time tlk about how they dont use condoms or they just pull out, and their doing this with ppl their not even in a relationship with. There are so many crazy std's out there why would you even want to put yaself through that.
I cant tlk for the older crowd on here but im 19 and there are to many lil girls out here (i refuse to call them young women) having babies. Having a child is a unselfish act…it takes time and love to raise one right. Even though I could never see myself having an abortion (i make sure i keep myself out of anything that could lead to that) I feel like if thats what you need to do then do it but just dont make it a habit.
Also we dont put enough responsibilty on the men when it comes to pregnancy . I feel like if your a guy and you know a baby is not something you want right now then you should always rap it up regardless of any circumstances.