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I have only dated within my race also. I've never been 'approaced' by any guy outside my race. I luv black men! Through all their love, all their honesty, all their integrity, even through the bullsh*t I still love them because they are our black men.

I know love comes in different races and you never know who you'll end up being w/ in the end. But truth be told, I'm not seeking out a white man so my kids could be mixed. Who does that? And if Barrack is their reason, they need to keep in mind that he was conceived out of love, not to "raise the bar".

u betta SAY DAT Ness! i love ur replies lol
well here in chicago, i honestly don't have a choice. if i want to date someone close to my age that will respect me it comes at the hands of a white man, or an indian, or a flip boy, or that mexian at the cleaners....brothas here are color stricken in the worst way. i'm in no way striving to sound like the sad bitter brown girl as i've been other places and been lusted after, but here? no dice!

when i see a man i feel. i was previously hung up on color and that led to many a lonely night with my boo Moscatto and some boomboom tunes on the ipod. i feel like you should just do whatever feels right....especially when remotely decent brothas are rarera than a $3 bill on the wesside in front of a herronheaded hooka. seriously, i'd like to settle down with a black man, but unless i move, the likelihood of that just isn't probable at all! there are some out there, i agree zilla, just not enough.

and ANOTHA thank, u need the breaks beat off u if ur hookin up with somebody to birtha bawack.! str8up! one yaself! i'm mixed and we are indeed a cute breed, but still! thas a shame! [mumbling to myself birth a bawack? mmmm not a bad idea lol ;P]

Thnx!! :)
Dang, I didn't know black men were color struck in Chicago?! Wow....tht's bananas.

U should come to NYC for a wk, hook one of these brothers and make him move to Chicago lol....lmao.

dude, i went to NY to visit a friend workign there this summer, and everybody was lovin this tea with honey! let me teeeeeeeeell u. if i was richa it'd be on. from doboys in harlem to a banker in times square when we were sight seeing. i was amazed at how cats just walked up to me like "we're going to dinner i'll send a car" i said "aaWHAAAT?!! oKAAAAY?!?! and marched my happass into the cutest thang i had and enjoyed myself" that has never and would never happen to me in chicago.... seriously my cousin gets cursed out daily and is going into debt for an ugly [inside and out] chick just because she's light with "hanihair",,,,,, its a dang shame. bawack is an exception and he's paying a light AND whiteside pieces MM! [rolling eyes]

I think that interracial relationships becoming more acceptable will be a wonderful energy flowing through our country. However, to seek someone out because you want your child to look a certain way does not have my stamp of approval. As far as dating outside of your race becoming an "it" thing......it has been for year. Now I feel is a time when people are becoming more open and willing to discuss their choices in partners.

Doesn't matter to me the color......we're all black with the lights out!!!! lmao

LOL!! sugar- but really you are right though. I dont have ANY problems with black women or men choosing to date outside our race. but what got my interest is there are so many black women who are choosing this route. Im no there (yet) but it'll be nice to see more multi-cultured families. but my concern is, if our sistas are "hopping the fence" and our brothers who have been doing the same, where does that leave the Black Family?
And, HELL NO! selecting a partner for the purpose of producing a bi-racial child is obsured. And whats up with these parents naming their newborns OBAMA?? REALLY PEOPLE? Lets not get carried away.

Regarding the Black family that leaves us null & void. ....in the sense of how we know it to be now. The Black family is evolving into some sort of vague openess without a firm healthy foundation. We don't know what the future may hold & I feel that is why it is so very important to teach one another, especially the youth, to know our history. It is heartbreaking. We need to know wisdom and knowledge from generations past. Our foremothers & forefathers would not approve of us no longer having an identity.

Ness, you know i feel the same way too. Even with all my drama over at blackmenvent.com, it hasnt changed my mind a bit about my love for our men. But like Xilla said, as we go into the future of an Obama Presidency, I expect to see more interracial couples than Ive ever seen! I dont know. I was watching that Sanaa Lathan flick "something new" on the oxygen channel the other night and that got me to thinking too about opening up my options but im not sure if im ready for all that. The image in my mind of my future husband and my soul mate is a black man, bottom line. like i said, for better or worse.

I saw tht movie too...and a lot of the points she raised like how he could never understand how she feels when she's at work and how he will never understand her stuggle as a black women b/c he's not a black man...I kinda understood. I think from race, to race there's different ways to do things. It's good she found luv w/ a white man (in the movie)

I for one know that raising a child in a black household is different from any other race and it's what works for us and what we expect of our children. I don't know how I would react if I married a white guy and I went to get a belt to tap tht ass on my kids for doing something wrong and he says, 'lets put him in a time out'. Nah...I'll take a time out if my arm gets tired lol (j/k) but we were raised on different systems.

I love my collards greens, bbq chicken, (real) mac n' cheese and other ethnic foods we eat. I don't want to be scrutinized b/c it's seen as unhealthy. It's what I was raisded on and I luv it. I don't want tofu...or bland as food (not to say tht's why they eat) but I luv flavor!

Aint nothing better than a BLACK man. :) Tht's why a good portion of white women, asian women, indian women and anyother woman has found their way into their arms! ;)

As a young male, I have been seeing alot of white woman gaining size in all the places that count, and now that white and black woman styles are getting so blended together, I could see myself trying out the whole white girl thing.

However, there is something about my sistas, mmm, I really don't know exactly what it is..really, it could be that I naturally relate because similar race, or that i feel that they have a personal strength that no other women have...but

they are such necessity for me in life..

It's funny u say that black women have personal strength...when most men feel that black women are "too strong natured" tht's why we loose so many of our men to other races.

I agree Alex, I think thats why I can only see myself with a Black Man; its because he seems to easily relate to my struggles, my confidence, even my bullshit. Im not sure if a white man would be able to hang, really. Its something about a brotha's swagger, WHEW!! LOL! But Im at a point in my life that Im starting think that maybe I should start to expand my bounderies and not necessarily limit myself to black men. Still scratching my head on this one...

I luv the swagger of the black man also. I went to a fight party this past wkend and I walked in & there was a large group of straight black men who were educated and had good jobs and their own sh*t together.

I was smiling from ear to ear the whole time. Not b/c I wanted someone to hollar but to see men get together and hang and keep it positive.

I don't think me not dating outside my race is limiting myself. I just think I attract what I'm attracted to. And to be honest we're all 'mixed'. None of us african americans are pure african. Our ancestors were brought here by slave owners and I'm sure u all know the slave owners were boinking the black slaves etc... so we're all mixed.

Ness, no truer words were ever spoken girl! we all got white great great great great great grandma or pa somewhere down the line LOL!

Girl you are so true, Everyone asks like were such a pure race, when that is so far from the truth. Everyone got black and white in them. Its just what you prefer in your mate.

Their swagger is the shit, but since I was younger I was intrigued by men of other races. I was in love with Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Zack Morris- Saved by the Bell). I even wrote a book in 6th grade about this imaginary love we had for each other. LOL ( I was a little weirdo). But as I got older I never had the balls to date a white man for fear that 1) what can we possibly have in common 2) What will people think when they see us together 3) What if that fucca freaks out and tries to kill my black ass and bury me in the backyard. See that is something u gotta think about. LOL

But black men are killing too so scratch that last comment.

I'm a white woman and I'm in a serious relationship with a black man. I agree with Ness. I'm not in this to have a mixed baby. I love my man, that's why we're together. And I don't plan on having children until we're married but even then I think it will be difficult for them. Even though they would come from a traditional family structure being of mixed race may be hard for them. I don't want my babies to be confused about who they are, what crowd to hang with, what music to listen to, etc... I've seen the situation go both ways. I know a mixed guy that seems to be more of a black guy and I know a teenage girl that isn't sure what she is, so she's angry and emo. So I don't think that people will be trying to make the next Barack, but that Barrack gives inspiration to all races including mixed race children and adults. Then they'll know that they don't have to be defined by one definiton but can be defined by many and it's ok.

I never cared much about interracial but never really thought that I would dig white women.
I think I started liking when I started to peep greek,middle eastern, and jewish mixed girls. The mixture was beaufitul
I don't see nothing wrong wit it

I have only dated inside my race also, well with the exception of a puerto rican or two but I dont count them. I was approached by a white man, and the be honest I didn't understand why he wanted to be with me so bad. I asked him was it the fact that the black fruit was forbidden, but he said no. He wasn't a wigger he was a real white man. IBM manager, homeowner, and played golf. A REAL WHITE MAN. I was so uncomfortable with even attempting to date him I just stopped talking to him. The man even felt that I was his soulmate. It was crazy. But as I think about it the heart has one color and doesn't care what the other person's color is, just how they make u feel.

I wonder what Ben is doing with himself.

I am biracial..Black and white.. And I don't care who anyone's dates and don't loathe black men and white women dating....thats what my parent are... I have dated different races and have been attracted to all races.... I dont see the big deal people are people... good or bad color shouldn't factor into anything.. I have dated good and bad from black and white.... I can see myself with a man not his color......

I like that pic though. It shows contrast very well.

I'm in an interracial relationship myself. My boyfriend is Black and I'm Asian. What is the big deal about interracially dating? People act like it's so foreign and unheard of.. I see it all the time and it's so common!! Maybe it's where we live, Bay Area in California, but mixed-race couples are so common here. Black Male/White Female, Black Female/White Male, Asian/White, Asian/Black, Latino/Asian, etc. My whole family is mixed! I have a white sister-in-law and about 50% of my Asian cousins are in interracial relationships or married to Whites, Blacks, Latinos.

The thing I hate most about being in an interracial relationship is when others quickly assume you're with that person because of some stereotype or assumption. People might think my bf is with me because he doesn't like Black Women or wants a light-skinned woman, or his favorite "he's a self-hating Black who can't handle a strong Black woman"; or people think I'm with my boyfriend because he has a large penis, or my personal favorite "Asian guys are too small and nerdy, so I need to seek a Black man for the ultimate sexual pleasure". But the fact is, we met one day, hit it off and really care about each other. We happen to get along great and have a normal relationship just like any same race couple. My last serious boyfriend was Asian and his children's mother is Black. Why can't we just date others from a different race because we find that person amazing and compatible and not have an ulterior motive?

Bravo

Im glad you found happiness with someone, Audrey. No matter his ethnicity.

I'm right along with you, Audrey! I grew up in a mixed-race town outside of Sacramento. I have sisters-in-law of different races so now I have nieces and nephews of mixed racial backgrounds and they're all beautiful!
When I dated a Black guy in high school, I know a lot of people, including some of my own friends, thought I only dated him because of the myth that all Black guys are "well endowed" (coughs) lol. Why don't they think we date because we LIKE the person.. not because we're having an experiment to see how it's like to be with someone of a different race?

I think it's important for women of other races to understand why black women INITIALLY had a problem with black men dating outside of their race...

it is simply because a lot, not all, but a significant number of black men began dating outside of their race because of self hatred - as stupid as it sounds they wanted light skinned children with "good hair", they did it because they felt white women would give them a status that a black woman couldn't give them, some do it simply to stick it to "white men" or society, there are black men who dated white women because they felt they were taking something that was forbidden to them for so long...

that is where most of our issues with interracial dating arose, when it's done for the wrong reasons it is sickening to witness, but when it happens naturally and two people are truly in love it is never a problem for mature black women

Right@HeadMistress; a mature women wouldnt have a problem at all with anybody being with anybody. I personally know some Black Women who still do have a problem with it, for the very reasons you stated. But there are also many Black Women who are now starting to say to themselves"You know what? Let me go ahead a see what Bob is talking about..." and they eventually start to step out of what they know to be their only preference and/or option. But no matter what race, background, even sexual preference, LOVE JUST FEELS GOOD. I applaud a sista that can go out and see what else is out there. And there are sistas who just prefer dating only brothas, like myself. But nobody should have a problem with people making decisions to love who ever they want. Thats the beauty of love.

LOL@ "You know what? Let me go ahead a see what Bob is talking about..."

and yes, that David Beckham, whooo he can definitely get it!!!

Im a latina and i love black men...i would love to have a mixed baby one day when i find the right guy.....nothing is ever said to me but i can see the looks from people when i walk with my man, that they dont accept it...especially from hispanics...

Ms Latin is that you girl?? Are you a part of the Tattoo Group on BP? If this is you, Its good to "see" you! LOL!! My username is Idoadoreu25. Lets catch up!!

yes lol...small world...lol...

News flash everyone. A black man is President. NOT A BLACK WOMEN. If anything a black man stock will continue to rise.
Don't there will all of sudden be white men who want black women. Most white guys want white women, hispanic and asian in the order pretty much. Most guys are not even attracted to black women.

Are you retarded or do you just like saying stupid shit?

LOL@ Ant - and what's so bad is that there are alot of Black Men who feel the same way this brotha does.

Your perspective on this post is all too familiar. Funny. No one is arguing about who the President is. And its interesting how you say that most guys arent even attracted to black women. I disagree completely with that. We are very desirable Titus. Why do you see many NOT ALL but many White Women attempting to darken their skin, create fuller lips, and posterior implants being the most requested cosmetic surgery? These are all characteristic of the Black Female. So while you may not see a long line of White Men searching for the Real Deal, you will notice that their Caucasion counterparts are looking very similar to us. As I said, your perspective is interesting, but I have to disagree, KING.

I think a time is gonna come when everybody is gonna be racially mixed, whether they're just bi-racial. I have a thing for interracial relationships because its a way of stepping outside the box. Interracial dating shows that there are more women [of ethnicties] to chose from

I think you a have a point Paul. And thats what Im beginning to think about as I get older; should I too consider this trend and step out of my box ? Im just not sure yet.
And I must stress this: As the co-author of this post, I dont or never will I have a problem with ANYONE choosing to be with ANYONE. Not at all. For me personally, my preference is Black Men. My point of the post was that many, NOT ALL, but many Black Women, a group that I am PROUD to be a part of, were typically known for their issues with their Black counterpart's dating choices (whether it be women of other ethnicities or Black Men dating other Black Men). But as of late, we are really starting to see more Black Women break out of those issues due to a variety of reasons. That was the point. I just didnt want it to get lost.

I grew up in the projects of Chicago. Went to a school that was all black. I mean so black that we only had maybe 10 whites teachers. All I really knew as a youth was Black. I joined the Army right out of high school and found myself living in Germany until I was 20. When I first got there it bugged me out that everyone was with a German chick and they of course were white. At first I was like naw not me. Then as I got to getting around and meeting people and making friends I realized that some of these chicks were pretty cool, and not bad looking if you could get back the body hair. lol. Anyway, I still didn't date any of them because I had hooked up with this juicy lil' thang from North Carolina so I was straight. I came away from this experience with a different idea about it though because a few of my partners were really into the ladies they were with. We would have all these conversations about mixed raced couples and how it really didn't matter as long as it was real. So i gets out of the Army after 4 years go to college and start my career,. Now my job takes me all over the world and everywhere I go I see interacial couples. Everybody is fucking everybody and no one has anything to say about it. It doesn't seem to be a problem anywhere but in the States. Headmistress made some god point about forbidden fruit and taking something from the white man, but in my opinion any one who is on that type of shit has other issues anyway and they hopefully will seek help. I won't even dignify this creating the next Obama shit with a comment.

ThatChickNik, if you meet a man who treats you with respect, makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside and gets you wet in all the right places. Take that into consideration and work with that before you dismiss the cat cause he got took out of the oven too soon. You might get the prize baby and aint nothing wrong with that.

I'm gotta be out. I'm in Romania and I got a date. Wish me luck!!!

Peace yall

LOL@ thanks for your perspective Ant. You alright with me. And GOOD LUCK!!

I haven't dated out of the race OFFICIALLY yet (middle school doesn't count. LOL).. I always threaten to b/c it seems the brothas just are not acting right....

BUT something is holding me back.... the chocolate skin, the lucious lips that can match mine, the mocha mystery HANGING below the border.. Um. LOL.

Its called delusion. The majority of white men like thin women. The average black women is overweight, white guys don't go for fat chicks. I am not talking about the tooth hillbillies living in trailer parks. You will not find a professional white man with the average black women from around the way.
Because Obama is in charge is not going to change anything, this is magical thinking by black women.
Black did not create good bodies GOD DID! And white with shapes and asses are not trying to be anything. Don't hate. And the majority of black men are more into latina
s anyway.
Black women are not desirable. I am not talking about video women or Halle Berry, but the average black women walking down the street. And every famous black women that gets a white men for the most part gets a no name white boy. So if a famous and good looking rich black women can only get an unknown white boy, then what chance does the average black women have? Facts speak for themselves.

LOL you are a moron. Before you come in here to spout off hatred, racist diatribe and poppycockery, shouldn't you brush up on your English and grammar skills? Your posts don't make sense anyway, and you have the nerve to speak foolishness? Oh, the irony!

You don't like black women, that's good for you. Judging by your post, there's not a damned thing we would want or see in you in the first place. LOL I love idiots on the internet.

Here's my story...

with both of my parents being mixed themselves (both being black and white) I am even more diluted in the race game. just like a majority of other mixed kids (well the ones i know) they grew up with the black card given to them. i was raised in a black house hold didnt know abt the white side of either sides...when i started to date i only dated black guys and that was the norm around me and my household. but when it came to my senior prom not one person in my family knew my date my date was white to my surprised they didnt mind that he was white...with me being both double-dipped of black and white...i have no problem dating white men or black me...but i still prefer to date a black male....

King Titus is obviously starved for attention, thats the only reason for being here saying stupid ish, to get a reaction

sorry King the men and women of this blog are too classy and intelligent to fall for and play your juvenile game, you're welcome to stay, learn and grow though

@Head EXACTLY!! The more I hear from fools like this one, the more I pray that he is a lone fool. Thats part of the reason why have difficulty finding quality men; they've resorted to the media way of thinking. @"King" Titus, If you dont see the beauty in an "average" Black Woman, shame on you! Get some therapy for the trauma you've been through in your life. Im going to leave this alone before Xilla's blog turns real ugly, real fast. Facts my ass...

I'll just say that if my great grandparents never dated or married out of their race I wouldn't be here lol. It's hard in itself to just classify me as "one race" so if I date any man who may happen to be Hawaiian, Tongan, Filipino, Portuguese, Chinese, German, Spanish or Fijian then I guess I'm dating inside of my "race." I've mostly dated Black men but within the past 5-6 years I've dated a Cajun/Cuban/etc. guy (who looked straight up white) and my current bf of 3 years is Mexican/Armenian/Italian... I wonder how many people nowadays are full-blooded anything anyways.