Throwback: Its Just Sex Why Are You Confused?

Posted in Life, Relationships, Sexual Intellectuals on Oct 28, 2008

C.A.F. Confusion After [the f-word]ing. Why does this happen? We all have heard it said, sex confusing things. Two people have been talking as friends for a while and one too many long island ice teas later they’ve slept together and things gets nuts.

She now thinks she is his girlfriend. She starts checking his cell phone, looking under his car seats for condom wrappers and smelling his dick whenever she sees him. Even when they bump into each other at the grocery store. She starts to call his house at all times of the night to see if she hears “that B*tch” in the background. She does things she never has done before because she is now dicknotized.

He nows stalks her myspace page, threatens to beat up her play brothers, real brothers and cousins because they blinked in her presence. He shows up at her job, trying to take her out to lunch at 8am in the morning. She calls her 50 million times to which she ignores every single call like her phone doesn’t ring. He then calls from a block number like she didn’t see his number on her caller id 2 milliseconds earlier. SMCH

They are both confused. But for what? You just had sex idiots, you were drunk and horny and your “friend” was in the room at the time. It doesn’t mean you now hold the exclusive rights. It means that you just slept with your friend because you were drunk and horny. Or whatever the circumstances might be. It’s nothing more. Sex should never confuse things. Unless you define everything out nothing changes. Or I should say nothing should change. What do you think?


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  • sex is confusing because nobody tells the truth...before I have sex now I always tell dudes 'if we have sex, then im goin to expect to be your official girlfriend, you know that right?"...most times they show their true colors....others still try to lie. Thats when I tell them I'm celibate anyway and walk away. No hurt feelings, no drama...no whack ass stroke game, no lazy pussy eating...its win win! lol...
  • Killa
    That's why I don't have casual sex...it gets too messy.
  • luvblogs
    hey off topic blogxilla i've been trying to reach u. but can u answer my mail and others u can answer to please. thanks


    1.)Ok i'm 18 not really sexually active you can say I don't get around like that you probarly label me as a good girl its like I don't need to rush to find a man or have boyfriend which I never had one. no I'M NOT A NERD OR MAYBE A WERIDO LOL. I'm just cool,ladiback,little shy. Just focus. Guys do come up to me buts its like whatever I know what some of them want is sex and other want what I want a faithfully realtisoship not having sex until we know each other inside and out you get me. like my reltionship mostlyu RELIGION
    (Gots to have jesus christ in life),Mind,Sex etc...... that comes first for me. My question is once I go on that date the topic Sex is going to come up like for exmaple he would say When was ur first time was it great ? Do I say I'm Virgin ! cause I know to a guy when they find out I'm virgin they think when can I pop that cherry lol. I Dont want a man to be with me cause i'm virgin thats why i'm scared. I know theirs not all guys are sex fiends their nothing wrong with sex I think about it all the time I know for a fact when I find that man we going to have sex all night lol and i learn new things on ur site how to pleasure my man one day.
    By the way I read this artical on chrisan woman to keep a her man doing things for him what woman shoud do lol and a man for his lady on Global Grind great artical

    2.) Another question lol do think Dating older man like 25-30 for me is BAD.
    Even if we unstand what we both want and don't want bascially would you date a 19 year old she had things you like about her and she was mature would you be with her like in a relationship (no I'm not going to call you R.kelly). lol Please don't tell me a older man can control a younger woman cause I think if you let people control you thats on you I wouldn't let people take advantage of me. Short story so you can get my view My friend was 19 too and she had boyfriend that was 29 no he didn't want the married life or the kids he did but not soon bascially he would buy her things like nice ass car and he wanted some ass and she new that so they broke up then she with this 28 year old same as the first guy with wating for marriage and kids also he buys her things not for sex just to do it out of love like her faviote things that she likes. yes she virgin also he understands that. he willing to wait. is he playing a game to be with her until she gives him what he wants. He told me one day he like the thrill and a chase and he like to court woman like my friend bascially that what he did to her is that bad thing.
  • VIChick
    Yes sweetie you should just wait until he responds to your email. This isn't really the right venue to ask these types of questions.
  • yes
    I don' t think a guy should bring up sex on the first date. That to me is a red flag that that is his goal, not getting to know me. I would tell him that is something I'm not comfortable talkin about so soon.

    And a 29 yr old MAN should not want a 19 yr old girlfriend no matter how grown you think you are. You two are on totally different levels.
  • Nixx_01
    Umm Luvblogs this aint the place to be posting your business. Your business is your business so I suggest you wait for BlogXilla to respond to you. Try to stick to the topic.
    Now... sex is confusing and shouldn't be entered into so lightly. However I do have an itch that needs to be scratched from time to time. I tell all my partners upfront what the deal is. It is what it is just sex. Have fun, enjoy it and be done.
  • That Girl
    I had sex w/ my male friend (I'm a female) and it COMPLICATED things big time.
    Story: I stopped in GA to visit him on my way to c my family. We hadn't seen each other in about 2yrs so he was excited & so was I. We hugged each other a lot for the first few hrs. We decided to watch a movie and b4 I knew it, we were heavy into foreplay. We had sex and continued to have proctected sex for the next few days that I was visiting. The condom broke/slipped off one too many times and I joked and said he better not get me prego! That statement changed things b/c when I got back to my home state, I was prego!! and pissed (I wasn't ready for a baby).

    I called him & told him and he was happy (he told his brother and nephew) and I told him I didn't want to keep it. He got pissed and didn't call me for 6months to a yr. When we finally talked he said that he felt that the baby was a sign that we should be together (b/c we crushed on each other when we were younger). I begged to differ! I was in college, living at home w/o a job and he was in a different state working min wage.

    So yeah Xilla, sex complicates things sometimes! :)
  • VIChick
    OH HELL YEA; Sex does complicate things big time. I had a friendship with his guy in college. We were always flirty with each other but never took it further. For about 4 years after college we always hung out . We even use to sleep in the same bed and nothing happened, until one night it was raining so bad that I spent the night at his house. The next thing I know we are fucking in the kitchen. We went to sleep, the next day I got up to go home and he asked me to spend the day with him. I was like um no playa. He kept calling me then had the nerve to start calling me his baby. I had to tell him I wasn't interested and it was just sex. Needless to say I had to end the friendship. It was sad because he was great with cars. lol
  • you can have a drink with a friend and not.
    end up in bed.
    sometimes it is allready written that is how yhings happen.
    http://hoodshow.com
    urban empowerment media
  • 99 probs but a bitch aint 1
    I think that it can be done when you have two mature individuals who are on similar paths........Example.......ole girl wants to be in a relationship, but to ease her own mind she tell her self (and others) otherwise. Her homeboi (said fuck buddy) may have a similar belief and will lie to himself (and others) as well. NOW........they leave Slice, RIPPED after eatin pizza and drinkin Belvedere & Red Bull all nite, go fuck somthing, wake up the next morning and keep it pushin. Casual sex is cool, if YOU can handle it. Not what the other party is sayin or behaving like. I feel that it is a wonderful experience to have a friend, be able to have enjoyable meaningful, no strings attached sex and still vibe. It's hard to find.............We are the last of a dying breed...
  • If sex doesn't confuse things and it's just sex then why does it always seem to complicate everything. Why isn't it easy? Sex is not just an act....there's strings attached that people don't realize. Good, Bad, and Annoying strings...but that's just my opinion
  • starr
    She calls her 50 million times to which she ignores every single call like her phone doesn’t ring. He then calls from a block number like she didn’t see his number on her caller id 2 milliseconds earlier. SMCH
    =======================================

    dat is tha damn truth lol..

    but i think sex is confusing because during it, while ur caught up in tha moment, you say things that might be misleading. I was with a guy where I too were confused, because we called each other baby, sweetie, stayed up all hours of tha night talking to each other, I would see him like every other day, etc. He was talking to other girls, I was talking to other men, but somehow we got caught up. We simply let our feelings known, and now we've been EXCLUSIVELY together for over a year now
  • sistagp
    during sex, multitude of emotions are expressed/shared. because of the friendship, emotions are there already. putting it together, of course emotions should be expected to be confused
  • just_passin_by
    If it was just a night where you both got drunk and got busy, I don't think one party should have certain expectations all of a sudden. It was just that...drunken sex. No need to catch feelings and act all crazy. But if somebody does catch feelings, there should be room to talk about it like mature adults and respect it if the other person doens't feel the same way
    Now if you are sober, that's a bit different to me. Because in my opinion that doesn't "just happen". There has to be a certain chemistry, a certain attraction that sets things off. It almost happened to me once and I had to stop hangin'with my friend because that really was too confusing for me. But in the end we are both gratefull that we took a step back and didn't do anything crazy. I would've been very hurt if I lost my friend over some ass.
  • allainjules
    Hum !

    What a beautiful lady !

    http://allainjulesblog.blogspot.com/
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