Alright, so Larry Johnson, my favorite NFL Running back and resident eye candy to all the ladies, is dating my favorite VJ off of the Negro Channel. SMCH!! No I’m not hating I’m just activating my PPP coverage [P*S$Y Payment Plan] Read Below for more Details.

Classic Post Updated

My love life is great, wait I should say my sex life is great, my love life sucks. I like to consider myself a good man, but I keep hearing I’m just not ready, I’m just not ready, it isn’t you it’s me. We all know that it really is you, and men never believe that shit. When I was younger it used to be cheat on your girl and it’s over, but now you can’t even call them, or expect to talk to them everyday, or You didn’t tell me you drive a ford or some other stupid ass reason. I’m at a point to where I’m bout to say Funk it and go back to being the Male Gigalow I once was. I mean I did all the little sweet things, open doors, offer my jacket, cooked, made up the bed when i left, run baths all of that stuff. But right now I’m at the point to where if Sanai Lathan walks up to me and ask me to be her man, I’m asking her ass for the time limit of when she is going to lie to me, string me along, tell me she doesn’t deserve me, say we can be just friends, or whatever the hell she did that night…

So from now on I am on the Pussy Payment Plan.(Penis Payment Plan for women) This is my last resort before I go into full fledged into whoredom! The Pussy payment plan works like a temp agency. You go out to your local pick up spot, In my case this will be a nice cafe I like to frequent. You should put on your flyest gear, your best smell goods and make sure you hair is done to perfection, if this means tipping the barber or stylist an extra 10 bucks do it, Yesterday! Once there you get at least 3 numbers, and they have to be quality numbers, consider this the sign up point. You know when you go and fill out all the applications, W-2’s and put down the same information on like 1000 different forms? That is what this is. So when you see the person you are interested in, go all out and bring your “A” game, smile, make them laugh, and keep the conversation interesting.

The Callback and First Interview

Ok so we all know that same day calling is out the question so give them a day or 2 before you call. This first conversation is key, so it’s more of the “A” game, and if the convo goes right then the first date should be set. I like to think that a weekday is more fitting for a first date. There are less people out where ever you decide to go so the atmosphere will me more in tuned for getting to know each other, I would say go out for some drinks it loosens the tongue.

Now, conversation is key, no one wants to be w/ a board or a deaf mute who sits there and looks nice all day so keep them talking. Now, once you got them opened up, here is where you let them know the key, that this whole process is nothing more than a lease w/ an option to buy. That the 2 of you will be dating **Exclusively** for a 3 month period (no one on the side Just the 2 of you) and if things should go well then the position if filled, if it’s just okay then you go about your life and i go about mine, it’s best for the heart. I swear my heart can’t take one more, It’s not you its me.

Your first day on the Job

The 2nd date is the most important, it means you did something right, if you know your shit you know that dating should be a stepping stool, never go all out on the first date. Keep it simple that way you can keep getting better, First date Drinks, 2nd date dinner at Fridays, 3rd date a fancy restaurant, and tickets to a play or something else out of the norm. That way you can keep topping yourself, keep out doing yourself and give her something to look forward to. But once you got the dating and conversation down, we move to the best part…

SEX

For this date you want to pick a place fairly close to the house, and here is the key if she touches your arm, she is interested, if she touches your leg, she interested tonight… A wise man told me that and so far it has worked! so until it doesn’t, live by it. But remember this is the Pussy Payment Plan you get all you can get out of it in 3 months, at the end of the 3 months if they are not the one you see yourself being with then you go back to the dealer and get yourself a newer model. Its dating at a higher level. So if your sick of being hurt, sick of having your heart stepped on, and abused, sign up for the Pussy Payment Plan!